Well guys, like that Michael Jackson movie says, this is it. The last Pop Culture QuickNotes ever. a single tear in the shape of Lindsay Lohan falls
Let’s dig in!
Johnny Depp was named the Sexiest Man Alive this week by People magazine. See Johnny? That’s better than any dumb Oscar. (IDLYITW)
While in London this week, Beyonce booked two hotel rooms – one for herself, and one for her luggage. Unfortunately, the luggage got two twin beds instead of a queen and hoo boy, you should have seen the luggage. It was livid. The luggage will never stay in that hotel again, no sir. (Celebslam)
Martha Stewart started shit with Rachel Ray this week, saying that she ‘cannot bake’ and is ‘more of an entertainer.’ Oh snap! I can’t wait to see what polite insults Rachel Ray has up her sleeves! (Which, for the record, Martha thinks are ‘a bit flashy.’) (Celebslam)
Megan Fox did a photoshoot for the New York Times (I know, what?) this week, and surprise surprise, she’s super flexible. She also loves steak, Matchbox cars, video games and doing butt stuff. (Popoholic)
This week, some of Mariah Carey‘s demands for an upcoming appearance had to be turned down by officials, including her desire to be ‘surrounded by 20 white kittens and 100 white doves.’ Ugh, officials. Always have to go and ruin everything. (WWTDD)
A weird ‘sex’ tape leaked this week that features Carmen Electra dancing around in underwear a little and kissing a girl she’s clearly not interested in. Not really sure why. Regardless, it seemed like something you’d want to see. (Hollywood Tuna)
This week, Lindsay Lohan refused to pay for things on two separate occasions, bringing her one step closer to a completely nonfunctional human being. Next week she’s going to forget how to walk and try to wear bread as clothes. (WWTDD, Celebslam)
Cleave of the week! Let’s do a double dose for this column’s grand finale, and give it to both Blake Lively and Katy Perry, two of my all-time cleave favorites. I’ll really miss you girls. You two, Blake and Katy. (Derekhail, Hollywood Tuna)
This week, Carrie Prejean admitted that she made a video of herself masturbating. But oh wait, there’s also SEVEN MORE. Because she made 8 videos of herself masturbating. Just in case. (now with pics!) (WWTDD, IDLYITW)
All the prettiest people alive where in town this week for the annual Pretty People Convention, otherwise known as the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show. (Hollywood Tuna)
This week, 90210 star Annalynne McCord refused to be photographed with Hills star Stephanie Pratt. You know your show is bad when someone from 90210 doesn’t want to be seen with you. (WWTDD)
Aaron Carter is in trouble with the government this week, after they realized he owed them over a million dollars in back taxes. I’m sorry, can we go back a step? Aaron Carter has enough money that he owes a cool mil just in TAXES? UGH. (Celebslam)
This week, Claire Danes reminded us all that she’s famous by appearing at a premiere in a see-through dress. Thanks for the reminder, Claire! (Egotastic)
In case you needed another reason to hate Derek Jeter, Phillies/Red Sox fans, here’s him hanging out with his super hot and bikini-clad girlfriend Minka Kelly. Anyone else suddenly feel the urge to start lifting weights? (Egotastic)
And last but not least, the final Still Got It. Katie Holmes new ‘homeless wet dog’ look gets her a nomination, but then again, so does Rihanna‘s unfortunate cheese thigh. Let’s just make them both winners. Everybody’s a winner! Except this column, of course. (WWTDD, Celebslam)
Thanks for reading!
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You Stink
At about 10pm, my roommate and I were in our normal habit of watching Adult Swim and playing random video games when all of a sudden we get a knock at our door. I go to open it and suddenly 2 guys burst in, with ninja wraps on their head, spray a lot of febreeze all over our stuff and run out leaving a note that says "You stink!". I was hurt until 5 minutes later... Read More »



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