Clerk: This is Downtown Escorts, how can I help you?
Talkboy: HOWWWDY-DOOO. THIS IS PETER MCCALLISTER, THE FAAATHER.
Clerk: That’s absolutely too much information already.
Talkboy: I’D LIKE A PROSTITUTE PLEASE.
Clerk: Escort, Mr. McCallister.
Talkboy: WITH AN EXTRA LARGE ASS, NO STDS, AND ONE OF THOSE LITTLE THIRD NIPPLES THAT YOU’RE AFRAID TO TOUCH.
Clerk: This is just a tape recorder played extra slow, isn’t it?
Talkboy: CREDIT CARRRD? YOU GOT IT.
Clerk: No, this is a cash-only business.
Talkboy: (rewind sound) CREDIT CARRRD? YOU GOT IT.
Clerk: I can’t process a credit card, asshole.
Talkboy: (rewind sound) THIS IS PETER MCCALLISTER, THE FAAATHER.
Clerk: Who is this really? Did you seriously think anyone would believe this is your voice?
Talkboy: (fastforward sound) EXTRA LARGE ASS, NO STDS –
Clerk: And one of those little third nipples that you’re afraid to touch. You really should have recorded some different lines in case I didn’t say EXACTLY what you hoped I’d say.
Talkboy: CREDIT CARRRD?
Clerk: NO.
Talkboy: YOU GOT IT.




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