(Frat brothers start high fiving and chest bumping each other)
Pledge 1 – I love to party and I love getting wasted!
Frat Guy – That might have been cool in middle school, but this is Alpha Kappa Omega! We poor beer in our cereal bowls just to get a jump start in the morning!
(Frat brothers smash beer cans on their heads and cheer)
Pledge 2- Not only do I love to party, but I love to get with all the ladies. I’ve had at 4 girls in my dorm room this semester.
Frat Guy – 4? Only 4 girls? This AKO, we are surrounded by tons of chicks. We get all the ladies out to our parties. From the skinny freshman girls to the cougars we find on spring break. Am I right Fellas!
(Frat brothers cheer, and one guy throws up. Then they all cheer again)
Frat Guy- Ok pledge 3, please tell me you have something to offer our great fraternity of AKO.
Pledge 3- When I was 6 years old, I flew off in a modified air balloon.
(Frat brothers turn down the music, and all get close to listen)
Pledge 3- I had the cops, news shows and helicopters looking for me for hours. I was the biggest story in 2009!
Frat Guy- That’s amazing! What happened next?
Pledge 3- I landed and was put on all sorts of news shows that were shown all over the country.
Frat Guy- Wow, that’s unbelievable! How did you do that when you were only 6 years old?
Pledge 3- That’s, uh, that’s really not that important.
Frat Guy- Well ok, but who is that old guy standing behind you?
Pledge 3- Oh, this, this is um, my dad. He said he had to come along.
Old Guy- Did you guys know I was once on a show called “Wife Swap”?
Pledge 3- Not now dad.
Frat Guy- Well I think I’ve heard enough, and I’m sure all of my brother’s agree with me that we want you to join. So, tell us your name, new brother of AKO?
Pledge 3- My name’s Falcon, (pops his collar) and I’m here to party.




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Honest Movie Titles: Oscars 2012
25 Things You Hate Yourself for Saying
12 Different Types of Hangovers
Every Superhero Origin Story Ever
Instagram Filters for Facebook
News Feed History of the World: February 2012
My all-dental dam band will never be this good.
All these Twitter accounts are run by Odie.
You will be more frightened while watching this video than anyone in it.
Good luck, detention monitor.
When is the holiday to memorialize stupid people lighting themselves on fire?
This guy better go to the ER...which stands for the Excellence Room! Boom.
Can I apply to Facebook College?
When you use GPS, your destination is always the grave.
The fact that the Nicolas Cage Project is not funded by the federal government is a TRAVESTY.