Katie: Who was it?
Katie’s Mom: That kid from down the street, but he said it wasn’t from him, it was from “his friend”. He was very specific about the quotation marks by the way.
Ryan: I don’t get it, man. I’ve been hitting on her real hard, but she doesn’t seem to respond.
Mike: Have you tried punching her really hard on the arm?
Ryan: Yes, like I just said. I’ve been hitting on her real hard. Pay attention.
Mike: That’s wierd. That is like the best way I know to tell a girl you like her.
Ryan: I know, right? I even tried to pinch her, and still there was nothing.
Mike: You pinched her? Wow, you must really like this girl, huh? There is one other thing you could try though. I saw my brother do it and they dated for a month after it. You should try tripping her feet in the hall infront of a large crowd.
Ryan: Genius. I’ll go do that now. I’ll talk to you later.
Ryan: Sure. Let’s just get some beers and some vodka and some shots first, then I’ll go.
Some-beers-and-some-vodka-and-some-shots time later.
Ryan: Hey Katie!!! Your boobs look tired, want me to hold them?
Katie smacks Ryan across the face.
Ryan: Alright! SCORE! hahaha tear
Ryan: Katie wait! Before you go home to that Barry guy, I have something I need to tell you. I love you. I’ve loved you since the first time I set eyes on you when we were kids. And I will always love you.
Katie: Who are you?
Ryan: It’s me, Ryan!
Katie: Ryan? Ryan from high school? Oh my god, I haven’t seen you in like 4 years.
Ryan: It’s 5 years actually.
Katie: Not exactly helping yourself there Ryan. You thought that you could walk up to me after 4 years and say you love me and then I’d be yours forever? hahaha
Katie walks away laughing.
Patricia: You already paid me. You don’t need to win me over with pick-up lines.




Every Time a Bell Rings
Job Interview Dos and Don'ts
The Internet Justice League
The 25 Best Sitcom Couples
Drinking Games for the Mature Adult
TV Valentine's Day Cards
Yoga pants so tight, they've become a part of her.
Wow, I guess having 5 blades does make a difference.
"Things Stoners Haven't Turned into Bongs" -- The Shortest Book in the World
Journalists finally revealing some hard-to-face truths
Kate Upton blocks shot of a beautiful sunset
Roommate Contract: (1) I will make your life a living hell.
Ways to meet women if you're tired of being normal.
Fixed it!
The kind of sports you can expect to see on ESPN17
Oh good, my package came. I've got a big night ahead of me.