The Circle of Death

Zebra: They’re announcing the birth of the new lion prince, Simba!

Gazelle: What?! And you’re gonna go there?

Zebra: Uh, duhhhh. He’s gonna be our king one day. I need to show my respects.

Gazelle: Or else what?

Zebra: Or else they’ll eat me.

Gazelle: And what’ll happen if you do show your respects?

Zebra: They’ll…eat me.

Gazelle: Exactly. All these lions do is eat us, and we’re supposed to gather right in front of them and thank them for tearing us apart and eating our flesh?

Zebra: To be fair, it’s worth it. They’re great leaders.

Gazelle: What do they do for us beyond eating us?

Zebra: Well, they control the local gazelle and zebra populations. Also…nevermind, that’s it.

Gazelle: It’s insane! And we go along with it every time a new prince is born. Even the fucking ants!

Worker Ant: QUEEN DEMANDS SO. MUST OBEY.

Gazelle: I mean, look at the invitation we all got. “Your King, Musafa the Mighty (Gazelle-Eater), Requests Your Attendance at the Coronation of His Son, Prince Simba the Magnificent (At Eating Gazelle).”

Zebra: But they’re definitely not planning on eating us this time. Look below: “A feast of unimaginable meat variety will follow.” They’re giving us a feast!

Gazelle: DO YOU EAT MEAT, STRIPE-BOY?! We ARE the feast. We’re going to gather around completely defenseless and they’re going to eat the shit out of us.

Zebra: …that sounds about right. That’s what happened last time.

Gazelle: What do you think would happen if you invited some delicious grass to attend a party of yours? Do you think the grass would show up?

Zebra: That’s a bad example. Zebras don’t have parties. We’re too busy being eaten by lions.

Gazelle: Well don’t you want to do something about it?!

Zebra: What are we supposed to do? Besides get eaten, that is.

Gazelle: Honestly, I think this place would be a lot better if we got rid of Mustafa and Simba. Someone should totally stampede them down a peg…

Gazelle’s Ghost: So…Mufasa was preventing global warming. Did not expect that.