A lot of people have been making a big deal about the Twilight movies. And by people I mean 14-25 year old girls/women. I will admit, embarrassingly, that I have watched the first movie. I’d claim that it was a forced situation, that a girl forced me to watch Twilight, but that’s not believable, is it? Does anyone really care about the plot of this movie because from what I can tell the only thing that the 14-25 year old female demographic cares about is the two main male characters Edward Cullen (vampire) and Jacob (shirtless werewolf ). This movie bothers me, partially because I was surprisingly kind of intrigued by the story but mostly because…

 

#1: Edward Cullen is technically somewhere around one hundred years old, and he’s hooking up with a high school chick. If he wasn’t a vampire, that wouldn’t be cool. He’d just be like any other hundred-year-old guy that hits on 16 year olds, incredibly creepy but endearing in an old person way…and in Jail. 

#2:

Jacob the werewolf, spends the entire second movie, or at least what the preview shows, with his shirt off. Essentially, this guy was paid to work out, get ripped, and have abs that you could shave Parmesan cheese on. Girls go ‘bieber fever’ for this guy, but I would like to claim that if I was paid to work out all the time, I too could look like that. Anyone could look like that. I'll give him so credit, he cashed in big time for having almost no acting skills. Anyway, I'm sick of talking about him like I'm a celebrity gossip reporter. I will end on this though, this guy is living the dream, and it is my duty as an American to hate him for that.