Captain's Log: The Jobless College Graduate

Tuesday, 2:38pm: I awoke under a floral comforter, wearing one sock, my trusty j-crew dress shirt and three silly bands. It seems as though the one or two beers to wind down after my 27th interview turned into drinking all of mom’s vodka again. I vaguely recall making a child cry during a heated battle in Halo. Anywho, time to seize the day and continue the job search!

Tuesday, 3:52pm: After a hardy breakfast of a large ice coffee from D&D, I spent the following 45 minutes fighting the urge to cry and/or vomit. While I may have won that battle, the day is still young and the quest for a job continues!

Tuesday, 5:17pm: After exhausting all available job search engines, I took a break to watch an hours worth of that sweet ass Eminem and Rihanna video. So freakin good. And that Hobbit from “The Lord of the Rings”  is a badass who dates Megan Fox! I mean, what?!  Anyways, back to work, gotta look for internships, ya know,  just as a back up plan.

Tuesday, 5:26pm: Upon finding available internships, I’ve learned that you need to apply through what seems to be an even more complex process than for an actual job. Interesting… Better watch that video again, I’m jonesing for some Hobbity domestic violence.

Tuesday, 7:03pm: Just finished the first step of 15 in applying for an internship. While I am discouraged, I am confident that I am currently at a minor speed bump in the road of life. Welp! I’m pooped after a long day of looking for a job. I guess I’ll just relax and have a beer or two.

Tuesday, 9:34pm: You call that shniping?! You shtoupid little noob. You sound like you’re ten. Wha? You’re eight? Well you play like an infant, biotch. Oh, go ahead and cry. You would.