A Dorm Room Toy Story

[Door slams shut]

Blackberry: Is she gone?

Digital Camera: Coast is clear!

Blackberry: What is she going to do in class without me? take notes?

Alarm Clock: Shut up! [BEEP] I’m just glad she is [BEEP]ing gone I thought that [BEEP] would never [BEEEEP]ing leave. [BEEP]

Digital Camera: Oh please! You get hit in the head once every morning. I get thrown around taxi’s, left at bars, thrown on the ground, and then she just forgets me till next weekend. One day she is just gunna leave me at the bar and never comeback.

Blackberry: You don’t have to listen to her drunk dial her ex boyfriends every weekend! 

Digital Camera: You dont know what you are talking about, CRACKBERRY You wanna throw down!?

Laptop: Will both of you shut up! Do you know what its like being on at all times? I can see the entire room from here and lets face it ever since she stopped going to the gym there is nothing pleasant about that. 

Digital Camera: At least she cares about you enough to never let your battery die.

Laptop: I pray every day that my battery will die. You have no idea what its like having to be a part of her pathetic Facebook in-boxes, her skype sex with that kid she never met, or her strange porn habits. You will never have to deal with the torture I deal with day to day.

Digital Camera: Wow.

Alarm Clock: Yea wow, man. I’m really [BEEP]ing sorry.

Blackberry: I didn’t know you were in so much pain 

[From under bed]

Vibrator: You guys have no idea how easy you have it.