Gold Diggers

Girl:  I’m going to work now, baby, so I’ll see you later.

Guy:  Wait, we need to talk.

Girl:  What’s wrong, baby?

Guy:  Okay honestly, you call me baby way too much. Can you tone it down a bit?

Girl:  Of course, baby! Is that all you wanted to talk about?

Guy:  We also need to break up.

Girl:  What do you mean we need to break up??

Guy:  Look, it’s not you…it’s…okay yeah it’s you.

Girl:  I can stop calling you baby so much! I swear!

Guy:  That’s not the problem.

Girl:  Then what is?

Guy:  I’m sorry, but I just can’t date a gold digger.

Girl:  What?? But I warned you before we even started dating!

Guy:  That was before I knew how much of a problem it really is!

Girl:  Well what the hell do you want me to do? I need to pay off my college loans somehow! You can’t blame me!

Guy:  It just seems like you’re more interested in getting money than you are interested in me!

Girl:  Being a gold digger is in my blood. My grandma was a gold digger, my mom was a gold digger, and I’m going to continue the tradition for my family!

Guy:  Well I feel you should at least—

Girl:  Seriously I’m going to be late for work so let’s talk about this later. Bye bye, baby!