An Excerpt from Michael Bay's Newest Screenplay

EXT. CITY- NIGHT

We see a peaceful city at rest. A couple of people look up at the sky. Nothing special, right? Well, get this motherf*ckers. A f*cking meteor rips through space. Cue the fast-paced violin. Vum vum vum vvum vvum vum vum vum. Cue the TREBLE CHORUS.

TREBLE CHORUS

Ooooaaahhhhh.

Heavy drum beat smash! The meteor breaks through the atmosphere!

INT. HELECOPTER

Oh hell yes, reader. You know what’s coming. But UNFORTUNATE PILOT and his COPILOT don’t.

UNFORTUNATE PILOT

What’s that, broseph?

COPILOT

I’m not sure. Update your facebook brofile, bro!

UNFORTUNATE PILOT

Bro!

COPILOT

Bro?

EXT. CITY- NIGHT

The meteor hits the f*cking helecopter, man! Like, blows it the f*ck up! Of course that shit happened! HOT GIRL screams. Her titties are like, massive, man! Her tits are like, oiled really shiny too so we see the reflection of the explosion on her tits!

HOT GIRL

My cellphone is ringing?

Hot girl takes out her cell-phone from between her cleavage. A huge f*ckin thing explodes behind her. She answers the call and MYSTERIOUS MAN answers.

MYSTERIOUS MAN

You, and only you have twelve seconds to save the world.

HOT GIRL

Wait! Who are you?

MYSTERIOUS MAN

I’m the man who dies unless you save me within the next twelve seconds.

She starts running, man. Explosions happen everywhere! A crane carrying some cinderblocks falls over and swings and smashes through the window of a building across the street and we zoom in on the falling shards of glass from the f*ckin building. In the reflection of the glass we see a mysterious man standing on street level looking up with a cell phone in his hand. The glass twists and we see the hot girl do a flip over some rubble. Will she get there in time? She only has twelve seconds!! Luckily, only I know, but you will too soon! Read on, reader!