Dear Diary,
Today was definitely a bad day. Obi Wan hurt me really really bad, and my body got pretty burnt. I don’t know what to do. Right now I just feel hell bent on total galaxy domination. Plus now I have to wear this black helmet all the time. I feel like it looks like a penis head but everyone says I’m imaging it. I think they’re just scared to say otherwise. AS THEY SHOULD BE. Ugh, sorry I don’t mean to yell in you diary. I just get so upset that my emotions get out of hand. This Dark Side stuff is harder than people think. The constant evil really makes you tired, and I’m going through Red Bull like it’s my job! I wonder if I put their symbol on my ship I’ll get a discount? Maybe, and if not I’ll just choke someone out until I get all I want.
OK, so I’m trying to draw out my new ship and I think I have it almost finished. Right now I just can’t figure out what to call it. I’m down to;
- Vader’s Destructor
- Big Daddy V’s Ball Room (get it!)
- Death Star (eh :-/)
- Pat
So yeah those are the names so far. I’ll get back to that later. Well I have to go and peel some more face off. Ouch! But then I’m going to get some Haggen Daz. Well, that’s it for now. Don’t tell my secrets now diary…OR I’LL HUNT YOU DOWN AND KILL YOUR FAMILY!



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