It's been an entire week since your last confession and there's been a lot of good, solid sinning going on across the country. Check out the top 5 and don't forget to submit your misdeeds to our submission page!
Vee H. from CSUF
I had a house mate who would do nothing to contribute around the house, barely pay rent and eat everyone else's food. After one too many times I had had enough. I bought a plain packet of donuts from the supermarket and topped them off with wasabi paste so they looked like frosting.They were left on the kitchen bench while my other housemate and I went across to the park. Of course when dipshit woke the first thing he saw was a dozen delicious donuts. When we returned from the park about an hour later dipshit was still trying to get the burning out of his mouth and throat.
You should have known that confiding in me that you think the house is haunted was a bad idea. Now, every time I find dried crap in the toilet bowl or dishes stacked in the living room or have to listen to you and your boyfriend's dirty talk through the walls ("ooohhh baaaabbbbyyy" really gets tired after a while) I just screw with your mind. I was the one that slammed the door at 3 AM. I am the one that keeps moving things around mysteriously in your room and I'm the one who set up an intercom system in the wall, so that now I can make scary whispering ghost noises and freak you out whenever I please. Also, my late night classes just happened to get out a few minutes before you hop in the shower and when you're walking around the house naked, remember that people can see through windows. I am not impressed.
Tricky T. from Evergreen State College
I have 3 male roommates, 2 of which decided to play a prank on the third one. I had nothing to do with it, and he never figured out who did it. Knowing he read CH on a regular basis, they posted here what they had done, but they signed it with my name. He reads it, and gets pissed at me, even though I had nothing to do with it. Yesterday, they came home wondering who posted the (photoshopped) picture of them making out all over campus. Don't mess with a computer geek.
Remember when you coated everything of mine with saran wrap, and then poured bubbler and bong water all over my room? Well, I found out through a mutual friend, and spent the entire second semester building up supplies for my revenge. After about 3 logs of skoal (30 tins), the 4 liter beaker I stole from the science wing was about 75% full with my spit. It should now be clear to you who put the "gallons of dip spit and broken glass" all over your wall and freshly cleaned sheets. Honestly, I'm surprised that you didn't immediately assume me. Now you know that I do not mess around with foul smelling liquids. Have a good summer, dick.
C. D. from Middlebury