8 Classic Nerd Maneuvers

Additional design and .giffery by Nathan "Peanut" Yaffe

8 Classic Nerd Maneuvers 1. CORRECT-SHUN: Dude snarkily holding up a single finger. Battle Cry: “Um, Actually...” Usage: When one of your simple-minded friends unwittingly confuses a piece of trivia, use this move to put them in their place. Example: “Um...Actually, the character is just called “The Doctor.” The show’s name is “Doctor Who.” 2. SCOFF LIMITS Dude holding up hands and making a disgusted face Battle Cry: “pfff seriously?” Usage: When some IDIOT says they like an obviously inferior show or videogame. Example: “Pffff you seriously liked that piece-of-shit zelda clone?” 3. SHARING IS SCARING Dude leaning with a leering expression Battle Cry: “DID YOU KNOW?” Usage: When you slyly infer without asking that your friends wanted to know about an interesting fact you heard earlier. Example: “Did you guys know that Cubone was originally designed to be the prior evolution of Kangaskhan? 4. RAGE FIT Dude leaning in and yelling at this computer Battle Cry: “FUUUUUUU-” Usage: Whenever something INCREDIBLY F*CKING STUPID happens on the Internet. Example: “THEY CANCELLED MEGA MAN LEGENDS 3? WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUU” 5. SQUEEFUL Battle-Cry: “Eeeeeeee!” Usage: Whenever something INCREDIBLY F*CKING AWESOME happens on the Internet. Example: “Philip Seymour Hoffman is gonna play Plutarch Heavensbee? EEEEEE THAT’S SO PERFECT!” 6. IN-ZONE - Dude snapping out of an intense daydream Battle-Cry: “Whu-?” Usage: When you’re completely zoned out and someone asks you a question. Example: “Whu-? Oh I’m sorry, I was thinking about The Marvel Cinematic Universe and didn’t hear what you said.” 7. BATMANEUVER A dude pointing in the opposite direction, then ghosting away. Battle-Cry: “....” Usage: When you want to flat-out avoid an awkward situation at any cost. Example: “Whoa look, it’s Christian Bale! Yeah, right....over...there...” 8. HOLD THE PHONE Two dudes keep interrupting eachother to check their phones Battle-Cry: “Hold On.” Usage: When you need to check your phone in the presence of a fellow nerd. Example: “Ooh hold on, someone favorited my tweet!”

Article