Little pranks are a great way to bring big laughs to the office. But if you stumble into a prank with no planning or foresight, you'll most likely bungle it (just look at how you handle most other things). To help your prank be all that it can be, we've created the following guide to crafting the perfect office prank.
STEP 1: CHOOSE THE TARGETSorry to the faint of heart, but there can't be a prank without a target. Consider this a sacrifice to the God of Pranks. They are chosen because they are worthy- truly an honor above all others! (Although like in the case of an actual sacrifice, we're willing to bet it's the type of honor they'd skip if given the chance.)
STEP 2: CHOOSE THE TYPE OF PRANKTailor your prank to the target you've chosen. If they're unstable, run a mind game. Neat freak? Mess with their stuff. And if they can't take a joke- do the most unforgivable prank you can think of and let the employment bridge you burn light your way to a new job where people actually have a sense of humor.
STEP 3: SET THE TONEAs we mentioned before, you really don't want to be pranking someone you legitimately dislike. Friends get pranked. Enemies get REVENGE, which shouldn't be confused with a prank that ended in a trip to the hospital.
STEP 4: DETERMINE THE DURATIONIf you're under the target's desk to scare them stupid, the duration is the length of their scream Otherwise just make sure you give it enough time to build without going so long you lose interest. Unless you're planning the prank of all pranks, wrap things up within the month.
STEP 5: IDENTIFY POTENTIAL CONSPIRATORSLike an awesome heist plot, pulling off a big prank requires help, but the more people you bring in, the more likely someone is to blow your cover. Treat the respect for the completed prank like it's literal gold and plan so that you can share it with the fewest number of conspirators possible.
STEP 6: PLANNING Now you're probably thinking, "What gives?! Haven't I been planning since step one?" Touché reader, touché. All we mean is work out the details. You only get one shot before the target is too jumpy and paranoid to fall for anything again.
STEP 7: THE EXECUTION At this point, everything is in place, all you need to do is STAY COOL. We're talking "Cucumber" cool Cool like the other side of the pillow ICE COOL. So cool that you end up with frostbite because you know what? WORTH IT.
STEP 8: THE PRESTIGE Now is the time to reveal yourself as the master trickster, the spinner of webs, the puller of legs. All will laugh and all will bow down before you KING OF ALL PRANKS! Now all you have to figure out is how to get everyone in the office to call you KING OF ALL PRANKS.