in shock at what just happened, instagram coming soon #WTF

yes to all @ replies , that's a dead horse on the hood of my car

be careful, don't tweet and drive #seriously

now dealing with a pretty angry horse and buggy guy, hansom cab driver i guess

praying my insurance covers a broken horse and buggy #prayforme

@geico no i'm good on car insurance i think but thanks.

i've been informed the horse's name was dynamite swirly, #RIP

enough everyone with the godfather jokes, okay, it's not like that??

really @amandarules12, breaking up with me on twitter because of this?

@_thegodfatherr pretty sure youre not real, so stop asking about horse heads

please support my kickstarter, it will pay for a shrine for dynamite swirly, the #horse $

@_thegodfatherr godfather2 is my favorite, yea ok, not really the time

@amandarules12, breaking up with me i promise not to tweet and drive again, sorry, don't do this because of a #horse

my jerk brother made a facebook update saying i "horsed around while driving." jerk!

stop "liking " this on facebook and in real life, not funny for me or the #horse

is #horsekiller about me? please don't be about me.

i don't want to be a trending topic, please, this is a catastrophe! #horsekiller cc @twitter

oh geez, they're gonna saw the horse in pieces so they can take him off the hood of my car, ugh

@homedepot this is not the time to tell me about your sale on saws, do u even get social media?

really @amandarules12, how about the time you ran over an ant colony with your bike?? cc @peta

u won't believe this, but the horse opened his eyes, and kicked, he's alive ! #hoof

okay you can stop using #horsekiller the #horse is alive actually thanks

screw @amandarules12 and my jerk brother, dynamite swirly lives #cuerockythemesong

there's a dent in the hood of my car, a crack in my windshield, who even cares?

i won't fix the damage, keeping it for memory #neveragain #dynamiteswirly

sorry for saying mean stuff @amandarules12, take me back #love #sorry <3

last time i tweet and drive, deleting twitter forever, might buy a horse instead #horses #LOL