- “I fucking hate you. I hate all of you.”
- “I love you guys.”
_________________________________________________________
- “Who is your boyfriend? I bet he sucks dick.”
- “Please don’t get your boyfriend.”
- “I didn’t say you suck dick, it was that guy over there.”
- “Shit. I think I’m bleeding.”
_________________________________________________________
- “You’re cute. I’d totally rape you”
- “I meant that if I were a rapist, I would rape you. It was supposed to be a compliment.”
- “I just meant that you’re my type, I think you’re cute.”
- “Please don’t call the police.”
_________________________________________________________
- “I am so drunk, I fucking love beer!”
- “I am never drinking again.”
- “I just threw up. I can’t drink anymore.”
- “Yeah, I guess you can pour me another one.”
- “I fucking love beer!”
_________________________________________________________
- “Officer, its okay, we were looking through her window before she started changing her clothes.”





News Feed History of the World: January 2012
8 Things the Internet Ruined
The True Meaning of Christmas, According to Christmas Movies
What People Will Say They're Thankful for This Thanksgiving, And What They Actually Mean
If TV Channels were Your Family
What Your Ski Tracks Say About You
Yoga pants so tight, they've become a part of her.
Wow, I guess having 5 blades does make a difference.
"Things Stoners Haven't Turned into Bongs" -- The Shortest Book in the World
Journalists finally revealing some hard-to-face truths
Kate Upton blocks shot of a beautiful sunset
Roommate Contract: (1) I will make your life a living hell.
Ways to meet women if you're tired of being normal.
Fixed it!
The kind of sports you can expect to see on ESPN17
Oh good, my package came. I've got a big night ahead of me.