Alex Watt is on Twitter, Tumblr and an ego trip.
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If Alcohol Had Mascots Like Cereal
-Regular Beer (Budweiser) -Uncle Bud -Bald fat Clydesdale horse with a mustache, and polo shirt tucked into sweatpants on a recliner. -Slogan: “Hey, sport. How about another Bud for your Uncle Bud?” -Light Beer (Bud Light) -Fresh Man -A freshman trying way too hard to seem cool (upside down visor, cologne, chain). -Slogan: “I gotta get mad slops!” -Malt Liquor (Olde English) -Chip -An actual Cheap Skate. -Slogan: “You don't need funds to have fun!" -Vodka (Smirnoff)* -OverBear -A Russian bear wearing cheesy club clothing. -Slogan: “DRINK IT!” -Tequila (Jose Cuervo) -Jose el Tigre -A very drunk Tony the Tiger wearing a sombrero. -Slogan: “You know what? You’re grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreat!” -Whiskey (Jameson)* -Saddy the Writer -A sad writer-type (maybe a dog)--like Hemingway--in front of a computer watching Netflix. -Slogan: “Good ‘til the last episode you watch as ‘inspiration!’” -Wine (could look like any brand) -Gray Ape -A gray ape with one of those French mustaches, he should look very romantic and suave. -Slogan: “Hoo-ho-merlot!” -Rum (Bacardi)* -Party Bat -A party bat (blind, but still cool). -Slogan: “You don’t need sight to party all night!” -Gin (Beefeater) -Great Aunt Geraldine -A cranky elderly badger widow. -Slogan: “Tastes like you’re deceased husband is still in the room!” -Caffeinated Gasoline (FourLOKO) -Jack S. Donkey -A flaming donkey on rollerblades. -Slogan: “I’m crazy for this sweet rocket fuel gravy!”