1. A rowdy Hitler youth reunion nearly brings the fuckin' roof down.
2. The window is left open to air out all the sin in the sheets.
3. On the nightstand is the latest issue of Dickhard Magazine.
4. Why the tattoo parlor? Why the minibar? Why the camera in the ceiling?
5. His holiness floats around and punches Protestant demons with the Bible.
6. A dwarf is in the closet only because he was teleported there.
7. The TV is always on and it's so loud that no one can hear it.
8. There's like 20 padlocks on the door but they're all made out of children's clay.
9. An unfinished game of Stratego still lingers quietly on the waterbed.
10. There's no bathroom since he's not supposed to do things like that anyway.