The Lost Diaries of Your Stuffed Animals

MISTER TRUNKS (May 7, 1993): Something was different about my Afternoon Snuggle with Brandon today. While we were cuddling, his mom started talking about “growing up” and “Spring Cleaning.” I don’t know what she meant, exactly, but Brandon started to squeeze me much, much tighter than usual, and I could feel his heart beating against my fluff.


PETER PUFF (May 8, 1993): Mister Trunks and I woke up today, and they were gone. Smoochbear, Miss Toots, Hug-a-Bug, Marshmallow Mindy, Captain Goochie and Lieutenant Goo. All of our friends… gone. Swiftly in the night. It’s just me and Mister Trunks now, and he doesn’t like me very much. Anyway, our friends are probably just on a Big Adventure. I can’t wait to hear their stories when they get back! I wonder if they’ll see a real live rainbow?


MISTER TRUNKS (July 8, 1996) : Over three years since the genocide, and I’m still stuck here in a dark closet with this psychotic douchebunny. He just sits across me smiling and humming “Walking on Sunshine.” If he asks me if I’ve ever seen a real live rainbow one more time, I swear to the Velveteen Rabbit I’m going to… Wait. Wait a second. Diary, I’ve had a long life, full of snuggles – and I think I just found my ticket out of this insufferable prison.


PETER PUFF (July 25, 1996): Oh gosh, oh gosh, it was terrible, it was terrible. Brandon opened the door and picked up Mister Trunks, and when he did… oh, gosh. Mister Trunks’ neck tore open like a Pez dispenser, and his head slumped backwards. His stomach exploded. Soft white fluff was pouring out of every open gash. It’s like his stitches had been loosened… I didn’t even know he was sick. Oh, gosh. I hear footsteps. That must be Brandon taking me to the hospital to see him!


PETER PUFF (July 26, 1996): It’s dark and smelly in this big green metal bin. I think it’s the waiting room. Hello, Banana Peel, will you be my friend? Howdy do, Milk Carton, do you like to dance? We can dance the Cha-Cha-Cha with this fellow over here, Mister Wet Rubber Balloon. I can’t wait for Brandon to come and get me. I’m beginning to forget his face… to forget… the colors… Mister Wet Rubber Balloon, have you ever seen a real live rainbow?