The average "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" contestant explains how they know the right answer:

Well, you see, when I was a small child growing up in the Midwest, my grandma used to cook these delicious pumpkin pies… We would go to her house for holidays, and there were always at least two pies baking in the oven. So, one day, my older brother and I decided to sneak in and steal one of them before dinner, so we could have one all to ourself! It wasn’t quite cooked yet, but we decided to eat it anyway. Unfortunately, the uncooked eggs in the pie were full of Salmonella bacteria, and my brother got violently sick and eventually died. Without my big brother there to defend me, my alcoholic father beat me mercilessly until I ran away at 15. Without any source of income or any special skills to speak of, I turned to the glorious life of truck stop prostitution. For the next four years, I traded sexual favors with hairy truck drivers in exchange for gas station egg-salad sandwiches and narcotics. One night, a meth-induced hallucination caused me to run naked for 34 miles until I finally ended up fighting a gang of 9 frat guys inside of a hardware store. I vaguely remember getting thrown into a rack of hand tools, so I know for sure that the answer is B, hammer, final answer…

What do you mean, no?

Can anyone give me a ride back to the truck stop?