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K W Schroeder

Fun Things to Say During Sex, Vol. I

by K W Schroeder on

1)Wouldn’t it be awesome if we had a sock full of batteries and a nail-gun?
2)You know, from behind you look just like a fat Jennifer Aniston.
3)I think the condom broke… twenty minutes ago!
4)Oh, by the way, your dad called earlier. He said to ask you about this weekend.
5)STOP! Ha ha, just kidding honey. … OH GOD! PLEASE MAKE IT STOP!
6)When we’re done, I want you to look at this thing on the end of my penis. It’s kind of warty-looking.
7)Your friend Janet is really looking good these days. Has she been dieting?
8)I’m getting close… Oh God… ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
9)…So I said to Carl, “Look man, I love my wife and everything, but yeah… like a fuckin’ drunk gorilla.”
10)Oh yeah, those antibiotics. Well, you see, that was this whole big thing, you know… doctors and stuff.
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K W Schroeder

K W Schroeder

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