Freshman Roommate Quiz

by Amir Blumenfeld on September 08, 2006
September is a very exciting time for college students -- especially freshmen.

Expectations are high because you've spent the first five classes just going over a syllabus. However, you are not in the clear yet. There is still one thing that can send those high hopes crashing down to earth fast: a horrible randomly assigned roommate.

But how can you tell if you're roommate is a dude or a dud? You guys just met! Administer this quiz to your new roommate and tabulate the score at the end to determine whether or not you're in for a good year.

1) On a scale of 1-10, how many items of mine do you plan on stealing from right under my nose, after I've left the room?

2)
  • (If a girl)How many times will you lock me out of the room so you can have, what can only be described as sweaty, loud sex with your horribly ugly boyfriend?
  • (If a guy) How many times will you lock me out of your room so you can have, what can only be described as sweaty, loud sex with your horribly ugly self.

    • 3) On a scale of 1-10 how difficult is your name to pronounce?

    4) Why do you keep staring at me even when I'm not talking to you? Seriously, I'm not trying to be a dick or anything, it just creeps me out. I dunno why but it does.

    5) How many computer games do you play that require you to wear a headset?

    Now. Add up all of your scores and use the guide below to figure out what kind of freshman year you are in for!

    0 = Fantastic. You won the roommate lottory.
    1-10 = Pretty good. No need to panic.
    11-20 = Hmm, may wanna ask the RA what the procedure is for switching dorm rooms.
    21-30 = Hmm, may wanna ask your lawyer the difference between first and second degree murder.
    31+ = Make it look like an accident.
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    Amir Blumenfeld

    Amir Blumenfeld

    UC Berkeley

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