Overheard At Art School

by Jesse Gold on December 27, 2006
  • This green, it’s a fire engine green. And I know that fire engines are red, but… if this was some… alternate plane where fire engines are green, this would be the green they would be.
  • On a scale of 1 to 10, I give this… the bottom hump of the 3 and the tail of the 9.
  • I don’t think I can properly analyze this piece with my eyes… perhaps if I turn slightly and… grant a view to my ear—Ah, yes.
  • If you wanted the world, why didn’t you just ask for the world? Instead you painted this.
  • The way you draw the figure, he seems to have a lot on his mind. A library book overdue. I can even see which one. Ayn Rand’s The Fountainhead. He hasn’t even started it yet. He hasn’t… even started.
  • Most of all what I absolutely love is how you painted this lovely white border around here and—what? That’s not painted in? Oh, you fail.
  • I know absolutely nothing of biological science… but this is a simply… deciduous painting. Pure emulsification.
  • There are so many positive things I can say about this piece… but that would be an insult to the negative space. Now what I hate is…
  • The music. Yes, yes! The music of this painting. Everyone, can you hear it? Can you feel it? Now, can you smell it? …well I can.
  • The way you paint it’s… you know what I want you to do? I want you to take a weaving class. Yes, Brad, I want you to walk out of here today and sign up for weaving. I think in forty years you could be a master weaver. What? Yes, I’ll be dead by then.
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