JD: What's this one?
Boon: I don't know, brah, I've been in one German class, and that was in high school.
JD: That was Spanish, fuckstick. They have those at airports, though. Windsocks... They're called windsocks.
Moose: Why the fuck does the wind need a sock, cunt-puncher?
JD: I hate you guys.

Boon: Dudes, this place is so much better than the States.
JD: Why? They all talk like mongoloids.
Moose: Look at the sign, fagtard. The speed limit is eighty miles-per-fucking-hour. Pedal to the metal, dip shits.


Boon:Twelve percent of what?
Moose: Beer. They're obsessed with it here, that probably means all the beer from now on is twelve percent alcohol.
JD: Are you sure it doesn't mean there's a hill ahead?
Moose: Why the fuck would a hill be twelve percent alcohol, you dyke snuggling homo-tuna fish?
JD: I'm not even going to try...


Boon: Hey, brah, that sign totally says fart!
Moose: Haha, aus-FART!
Boon: Good one, Moose.


JD: Dudes, look out, concentration camp ahead!
Moose: Sieg heil! Haha!
Boon: Hitler was pretty cool, huh?
Moose: Yeah, I hate the Jews.
JD: Me, too.

JD: Hey man, deer ahead. Watch out.
Moose: Hey, cockmaster, they call them Jägermeisters in Germany.
JD: How in the hell do you know that?
Moose: Haven't you ever seen a bottle of Jäger, numb nuts? There's a fucking deer on it.
JD: Why would they name an expensive liquor "Deer"?
Moose: Because they're Nazis, you queer-faced dick licker.
Boon: Hey, brah, I think he's right.

Boon: Haha, I know what that means!
JD: Titties!
Moose: Not like you care about titties, you fudge packer.
JD: Fuck you, douche bag. I've had more sex than both of you.
Moose: Yeah, with DUDES!
Boon: BURN! Good one, Moose.
JD: I swear to god I'm going to kill one of you.


Boon: Dude, look at that one! I think I saw a show about cars that go underwater. I didn't know they had those here, fuckin' a, man.
JD: Hey, pull over, man, we have to find another way around. I'm pretty sure this car can't do that.
Boon:Why would they give us a car that couldn't go underwater? Trust me, they wouldn't dick us over like that.
Moose: Thats what she said!
Boon: Dude, that doesn't work.
Moose: Oh... Hey, you guys remember when I made that aus-FART joke?
JD: Yeah...
Moose: That was hilarious.

This article was loosely inspired and based off of Streeter's "Truth In Road Signs."