Apparently not. Last night’s episode choose to completely ignore the oncoming (or at least hopefully oncoming, who knows what this show is capable of at this point) war and instead focus on Christopher (not too terrible of an idea) and A.J. (a terrible idea) and how they choose to cope with the deterioration of their key relationships.

We open with A.J. on the couch, where he would remain for the majority of the episode. Anthony Jr., of course, finds himself suffering from a broken heart as his fiancée dumped him in the previous week’s episode. Between A.J. bursting into tears (and being a fairly mediocre actor to begin with) and Tony and Carmela’s feeble attempts to console him (even though they were both happy the relationship didn’t work out) most of these scenes were a little awkward, to say the least. How do you cure a broken heart? Carmela wants to coddle A.J., Tony’s plan for the boy is a little more simple. Get him out, get him drunk, and get him having a good time. Easier said than done, however, as both father and son aren’t the most happy-go-lucky lot in the world. Tony’s view on things? "Everything turns to shit." We know of Tony’s battles with depression and he confesses to Dr. Melfi that he blames himself for A.J.’s similar attitude, claiming that he infested his son with his own "rotten, putrid genes".

 

While Tony struggles with the progress of his own therapy, A.J. seems to embrace the therapist he has been sent to talk to. Or more accurately, embrace the new prescription drugs he’s on. Lexapro to the rescue! A.J. finds himself off the couch, but into a whole other sketchy situation, as he reunites with a couple of old friends who currently run a numbers racket at their college. When one of their customers doesn’t pay up on time, the guys take the poor bastard out to the middle of the woods for a little of the old "pay up or you’ll get it even worse next time". As A.J. watches the welcher’s torture (they poured sulfuric acid on the kid’s foot), he gets a fierce, gleeful look in his eyes, (if you weren’t a little creeped out by the freaky intensity in his eyes, then you must be some kind of robot. Seriously, it was terrifying. What exactly did the director say to him to get that look on his face? "Ok, you’re a pedophile and there’s a gaggle of twelve year olds just getting out of class. You’ve got a full tank of gas and lots of frozen delights in your stolen ice cream truck. You’re totally gonna score. And….go!) as if he’s finally found a place where he belongs. Seemingly back to his old self as he sits down with his family for a late-night meal, A.J. seems to be out of his funk, but at what cost? Looks like he might have inherited those "putrid genes" from his father after all and just might be headed down a similar path.

 

Also falling fast is Christopher. Trying to stay clean and sober, Chris has found himself ostracized (which was pronounced about ten different ways during the course of the episode. Apparently gangsters don’t have to take the SAT’s to get into undergraduate mobster program at their local community college) from the crew. He tries to discuss his problems with Tony, believing that his struggles and Tony’s battle with depression are similar. Tony doesn’t exactly see it that way and again Chris finds himself on the outside looking in, as it’s clear that Bobby is slowly taking over Chris’s place. His real antagonist, however, is Paulie Walnuts. Paulie, who has pretty much turned breaking Chris’s balls into an art form by this point, doesn’t understand why Christopher is struggling with additions to alcohol and drugs. His advice? "Just be normal." Brilliant. He should teach a class or something. To make matters worse, the family is using Chris’s father-in-law’s hardware store to move stolen power tools and Paulie is using it as his own private piggy bank, sending his nephew Little Paulie to break into the store and lift the goods to use for payoffs and such. Christopher, of course, is less than thrilled with this idea and goes to talk to Tony. Tony, in one of those vindictive moves he’s so well known for, basically attacks Chris for distancing himself from the group.

 

Chris decides to deal with the power tools problem himself and, after Little Paulie again takes goods from the store, Chris beats the holy hell out of him and throws him out a window. Fair enough. Paulie’s response? Tearing the holy hell out of Christopher’s with his car in front of Chris’s wife and child. While this back-and-forth probably could have gone on forever (and probably would have been hilarious), Christopher decides to be the bigger man and apologize to Paulie. Then, in an attempt to finally earn some respect from the man, Christopher shares a drink with him, deciding that maybe his vow of sobriety isn’t as important as being in the good graces of the family.

Unfortunately, Chris’s ploy to earn Paulie’s regard lasts about ten seconds as he proceeds to belittle Chris yet again, this time in front of the crew (and especially Tony). Chris, now drunk, storms out of the room and goes to see the only "friend" he has left, JT, writer of "Cleaver" and former addict himself. JT, on a deadline to produce an episode of "Law & Order" and (smartly) fearful of his life, wants nothing to do with Christopher, let alone a drunk and tearful Christopher. Even though he has beat him within an inch of his life on several occasions, Chris seems legitimately surprised when JT is hesitant to help him. Christopher tries to pour his heart out to JT, but JT doesn’t want to hear it and just wants Chris out of his apartment. You know what else he probably wants out? The bullet Chris puts squarely in his brain moments later, adding another ghost (along with Adriana’s) that Chris has to deal with. He’s clearly upset by his slighting in the crew and reveals (to pretty much any stranger that will listen) that he chose Tony over Adriana and Tony clearly never appreciated his loyalty. He clearly wants to tell someone (or anyone) what’s going on with the family and how he feels betrayed. I don’t think a call to the FBI is all that far-fetched at this point. Chris stumbles home, off the wagon and at an emotional low, and the episode fades into black.

 

 

Another noteworthy scene in the episode was that the FBI Anti-Terrorism agents (let’s just call them Terror Squad!) took a break from standing outside of Tony’s house waiting for him to get the paper to have some peppers and onions at Satriale’s. They again ask Tony if he’s seen any suspicious activity that could be terror related. Tony wants to know what’s in it for him and Terror Squad! informs him that if he cooperates, they can provide him with a 5K letter (something along the lines of a college recommendation from your high school guidance counselor) which will go along with his file, if (or more accurately, when) he gets arrested. Tony tells the agents that he saw two shady guys, Akhmed and Mohammed (two former regulars at the Bing, who were involved in some shady dealings with Adriana at one point) doing some sketchy things (walking around outside). The agents take down the information and inform Tony that he’s doing the right thing in helping his country. Is this going to end up being Tony’s "Get Out of Jail Free" card? Yeah, I doubt it too, but who knows? Hopefully this will have a payoff somewhere down the line.

 

I just wrote over a thousand words on this episode, but I probably could have just typed "Nothing happened" and pretty much covered all the bases. Overall, this wasn’t a terrible episode (well acted, well written, and a cool twist with Chris shooting JT) and would have been solid if it had been in the middle of any other season. But one of the five final episodes? Not so great. Here’s my problem with this and most of the other episodes in this half of the season. Instead of driving the story forward to the conclusion, they seem to serve more as a collection of possible ways to bring Tony down. Every episode features a character that could possibly be his downfall in the end (this week it was Christopher, last week it was Carmela and Hesh, the week before it was Paulie, Phil is always lurking in the wings, and so on). I just don’t think it’s really working. Considering that David Chase said that he always knew how the story was going to end, a lot of these episodes feel like filler or that the writers are throwing out a bunch of red herrings at us to make the ending more shocking. Viewers are waiting for some kind of payoff and we have yet to receive one. And that’s pretty frustrating. I think those loyal to the show need some real movement forward in these last four episodes. Next week, I guess we’ll see if we get it.