Because I Watch The View Sometimes

by Chris Richman on June 11, 2007

Because I watch "The View" sometimes
And "Sex in the City"
That doesn’t mean you jerks can doubt
My sexuality.
           
I wear a scarf, paint my toenails
But so do lots of guys
Like Dave Navarro, the dude with        
The dark and piercing eyes.

I love to paint and sculpt so much
And long walks in the park
But since when does that make it seem
I hide in closets dark?

There’s nothing wrong with being gay -
That said, it's not for me;
I’d rather make love to a girl
With sensitivity.

You mean I have to rail the girl
To prove that I am straight?
No thanks, that’s not the way I am
I’d rather masturbate.

To pictures of my favorite stars
From all my best-loved flicks
Like “Soldier Boys” and “Real Bad Cops”
Okay, I do love dicks.

Submit your hilarious poems to The Poetry Corner! Write one, post it as an article, and send the link to CHPoetryCorner@gmail.com.
Check out past poems here.

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Since you're going to spend your time clicking around the Internet anyway, why not do it with StumbleUpon? Let them show you everything, including that one site where the Asian girl's eyes follow the mouse. Go. Right now.