So I learned a valuable lesson a few days ago. I was walking my dog one morning and what did I find? A baby bird being slapped around like a ball. I quickly recovered the poor thing. As I held the poor shivering bird in my hand I tried to think of what to do with it. At first I thought of raising the poor thing, but it was too small for me to raise it. How would I care for it? No I thought no matter how much I wanted to keep the bird it was better off with its mom. As I looked down at it with its big brown eyes, I realized even though it look like a mix between golem from lord of the rings and tweety bird it was so ugly it was cute. It immediately started singing and opening its mouth for food, so while I fed it carefully some milk through a dropper, I thought of a plan. First I tried to locate the nest, but couldn't find it. So I Placed the bird high into the tree on an improvised nest, while going out to buy something to make a birdhouse.
Price of towel - nothing already had one
Price of ladder - nothing already had one
Price of hanging basket - 20 dollars
Price of nice soft moss - 3 dollars
Price of rescuing a baby bird from a cat then later coming back to find the bird missing with only a bit of dropping left. well just plain sad.
Price of coming to the realization that I just spent a better part of a day and 23 dollars plus tax on a bird that ended up dead anyways and how much of an idiot I was to put the stupid thing back up in the damn tree.... priceless

by Jeremy at University of Florida
by Jake Hurwitz at Hunter College
by Jim Dunson
Bring home your very own Dramatic Chipmunk, LOLcat, and hamster stuck in a wheel.
Trinity Miracle: End Zone Shot
****
A quick look at the themes that didn't make the cut.
One of the few areas where videogames and naked women meet.
Donald Glover discusses his issues with dating and racial stereotypes.
Best yet.
A young Bill O'Reilly introduces a news report about a new fad that's sweeping the nation in 1988: Nintendo!