I hate having irritable bowel syndrome. Here's my day for you.
Me: I think I'll turn on some music.
Bowel: Don't put on any of those emo bands. You know I hate that crap.
Me: I thought you liked crap.
Bowel: And I've just about had it with your stupid crap jokes.
Me: I'm going to go exercise now.
Bowel: The hell you are. I'm fed up with all that bouncing and sweating.
Me: It's good for us.
Bowel: There is no us.
My Date: Wow, what a nice place you have.
Bowel: Tell that dweeb his hair looks like a turd.
Me: It does not look like a turd.
My Date: I'm sorry, what?
Me: I was talking to my bowel.
My Date: Maybe I should leave.
by Alexandra P. at Harvard
by Brian Murphy
by Owen Parsons
the iPad is so stupid that the number of comedy possibilities is just... astounding.
Gmail, Firefox, YouPorn and more speak up to keep you from doing your work.
The Black Ranger is black... the Yellow Ranger is Asian... uh oh.
Look out for d-bags and children on leashes.
Why stop yourself from having sex with your mom, when you can make it a threesome?
I'm lonely.
It s the Tuesday before Valentine s Day, which means you only have six days to convince your girlfriend that you�ve been thinking about this occasion since the day you met. Luckily, I m here with a day-by-day breakdown of what you should be doing.
Hook ups can range from something to do on a Saturday night to life altering greatness. Here is the hook up hierarchy, Level 1 being the highest.
The dog was the first one down at the party... just so happens we had markers and a kid to keep entertained haha
Recording...
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