Lilly vs. the cat

by Lilly Walleck on July 03, 2007

What I imagine as the inner monologue of Jasper the cat:

I'm getting a little bored of pawing at this obviously inanimate mouse thingie..what to do, what to do.. I could lick my own asshole for a little bit..Yeah that sounds good.

[Jasper proceeds to perform auto-analingus for a good 20 minute block]

Bored again. Holy shit is that a mouse? I'm gonna bat at it.

Bored again. Why don't I play in the attic? I wonder why I always have violent hacking fits when I'm up there in the dust and mildew. Weird.

What's..this? A new person? She seems to be trying to ignore me. I bet that's her coy way of saying, "Please, Jasper, rub your ass on me." Silly little filly, you don't have to play games!

[Despite the blonde, dashing stranger's attempts to get away, Jasper resolutely tries to rub his ass against her]

Wait, why is she still ignoring me? Ugh this girl is GOOD! I am hooked. From now on, my mission is to rub my ass on her as often as possible. It's not like she's doing anything important like playing with a mouse or some string..