I am a pre-med student and every advisor will tell you how important work in the medical field is to getting into medical school….Fuck off advisors, you clean up shit all summer and then let’s see if that shit-eating grin is still on your face.For the past two summers I worked in an Emergency Room and have heard my friends complain about their better paying engineering internships.I hear about their “rough days” and let me explain to you why you should be happy about your job.

Doctor’s pay attention to which of the orderlies are planning on pursuing a career in medicine and often times allow us to observe or even help in certain procedures.One time a patient needed a lumbar puncture, which is just a fancy term for spinal tap.The doctor told me to come in and that I could help.The patient was sitting up and the doctor had me hold her shoulders down so she could get a clean line to the lumbar.A few hours later the doctor and nurse came up to me telling me that the patient had bacterial meningitis and since I had been standing in front of the patient I was in all likelihood infected and that if I didn’t receive immediate medical attention I might die.They had me fully checked into the hospital’s ER before they informed me that it was a sick joke. Really. Fucking. Cool.

Apparently the person who had my job before me quit after an incident that went something as follows: The first day on the job a patient died and they needed to bring the dead body to the morgue.A few nurses worked quickly to clear the room of the body and then sent the guy with my job into the room with no corpse.When he started moving the morgue cart, a co-worked had hidden under the shroud only to jump up when he was alone in the elevator…….He never came back, not even to get his only check.

The first time I had to deal with a dead body the guy threw up on me.Yes, you read that right, he threw up on me. Everything from a dead guy’s stomach poured onto my foot when we were trying to move him into the morgue cart.Try to tell me that your work has worse work hazards.On top of this already traumatic experience, when I was getting onto the elevator I had a co-worker ask me “Just in case…..how would you kill a zombie?"