The Harder You Party



Andrew WK royalty checks mailed

Percentage of party remembered

Partying rights fought for

Unprotected sex

Probability that your parents will return from Hawaii early

Birthday cakes eaten

Birthday cakes sexed
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Onion Sports has quickly become the nation's number-one site for hard-hitting sports news, stats, and information that isn't true. If you hadn't figured this out yet, what The Onion is to news, Onion Sports is to sports.