Coming Soon to Mount Vernon

In response to Dog the Bounty Hunter's recent racist remarks, last week he announced plans to be buried at the slave cemetery at Mount Vernon, presumably after his death:


"Children will come to [the burial ground] saying 'Why is dog buried there? Why is that white man laid there?' And [they're parents will] be able to say, 'because that white man made a terrible mistake and he requested that"

Through my inside sources I have learned that the folks at Mount Vernon are so behind the idea that they have already begun preparing promotional materials to reflect this upcoming addition. I have obtained an exclusive sample and, if you'll have me, I'd like to share it:

Come to Mount Vernon, where history comes alive! See where the father of our country hung his tri cornered hat, and where his slave's unmarked graves serve as an eternal place of punishment for c-list celebrities!

Join our historic re-enactors (pictured above) as you make your own cornmeal and cider while recording a family member saying the n-word!

Make sure to visit the Dog-Washington Pavilion to buy a copy of Washington's memoirs or a mullet braiding kit!


That infamous cherry tree, did Washington Really cut it down? Could he really not tell a lie? And why we would bury a semi-obscure reality television star in the middle of a historic site just because he asked us to? Find out the answers to those questions and many others!


Weather you are here for a day, a week or all entirety because you wouldn't let your son date a black even though you didn't care if she was "a Mexican, a whore or whatever" we hope to see you soon at Dog's Mount Vernon.

Coming soon... that one white chick that spit on the black chick on 'Flavor of Love', unless the Smithsonian grabs her first!

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