There is no doubt that Bioshock was one of, if not the best, video game of 2007. Along with killing genetically enhanced splicers, saving the Adam-extrapolating Little Sisters, and figuring out the immense secrets of Rapture you had the distinct ability to use Plasmids. In essence, Plasmids are genetic modifiers found within the city of Rapture that let you "evolve" yourself with great powers like Telekinesis (the ability to move objects with your mind), Incinerate (lighting objects on fire), and my personal favorite Insect Swarm (sending a barrage of angry insects at your enemies). I thought, "Boy, I'd love to have my own Plasmids..." And with the magic of my own imagination I have a few Plasmids of my own. I went out today in public to test my super-evolved powers in, of course, The Valley.

FLUSH Plasmid: No one enjoys flushing a public bathroom toilet. Some people even hate doing it at their friends and neighbors homes. My first plasmid, FLUSH, allows you to instantly flush any toilet or urinal without touching it. Also, you can get FLUSH 2 that gives you the ability to open bathroom doors and turn sink knobs telekinetically.

GENEROSITY Plasmid: This girl inspired me for the second plasmid. While in Borders she called her friend and said, "Hey DVD sets are 40% off do you want me to get you Seinfeld Season 9 or Arrested Development?" That's pretty darn nice! So I jumped on the chance to take that idea and infused myself with GENEROSITY.

ASIAN KID Plasmid: Not only does this Plasmid rhyme which is cool, but if you look at that Asian kid guess what? He used to be an old Navajo woman. ASIAN KID Plasmid let's you change any person into a little Asian kid! How cool is that?

STOP DRIVING LIKE AN ASSHOLE Plasmid: The Valley has more SUV's and top-notch awful drivers than anywhere in the country. Just like this certified douchebag who decided to swerve over to my right turn only lane to go straight while not only blocking my way, but the Prius next to me. I smacked him with the STOP DRIVING LIKE AN ASSHOLE Plasmid and he immediately waved a "sorry" wave and drove to pick up the kids from volunteering at the local nursing home (I had hit his kids with GENEROSITY earlier).

a side note: Taking these photos without other people noticing what i was doing was totally awkward and fun.