Throughout your life of drinking, you are going to run into some certain bands or songs that are just going to preach the words of life to you.  In some cases, the songs and or bands in question are going to set you on a course for a fine life.  In other cases, the songs and or bands in question are going to destroy you.  Oasis is a fine example of the first mentioned group.  So kick back, open a bottle of whisky, and follow this guide; you will reach a promised land of some type.

#1. The Pre-game Drive Song: "Hello"
This song is short, sweet, and it gets to the point. On your drive to the location of the alcohol, you want to get there as fast as you fucking can, and that is exactly what this song is saying, just as you walk into the door.

#2. The Buzzed Song: "Rock ˜N' Roll Star"
After you have had a couple beers, mingled with some girls, and tell the totally awesome story of how you totally did so many drugs before you arrived to your friends, you are feeling like, well, a Rock ˜N' Roll Star.

#3. The "I Am Superman?" Song: "Morning Glory"
Your enhanced level of self-confidence and esteem has risen to near mammoth proportions, and you want this to "the day that all the world will see." So you decide to rip that bottle of vodka from the table and take a 10 second shot from it. Yes, you will need a little time to wake up in the morning, but fuck, right now, YOU ARE THE MORNING, THE SUN, AND ALL THAT IS MAN!

#4. The On the Path to Destruction Song: "Roll With It"
At the start of this song, Liam Gallagher tells you to "roll with it" and "say what you got to say." Not the best advise at this point, but seriously, who is going to care about the time you hooked up with your friend's sister. Oops, I guess he did. Oh well, "SEND OVER THAT BOTTLE OF UV BLUE TO ME! IF YOU PUSSIES CAN'T FINISH IT, LET A REAL MAN PUT HIS LIPS TO THE LIQUOR!"

Now depending on your tolerance for alcohol, you will either continue onto song 5, or you will skip ahead to song 6.

#5. The "Oh Fuck Did I Just Eat that Cigarette Butt Instead of that Chip?" Song: "My Big Mouth"
At this point, you are touching, smelling, attempting to drink and running into everything that has matter to it, which is well, everything. There is a 95% chance that you will have no memory of your actions during this time, and that is often a blessing. "Guess who's going to take the blame for my big mouth?" Yep, that is you buddy.

#6. The "I Promised Myself I Would Never Drink This Much." Song: "The Girl in the Dirty Shirt"
"The girl in the dirty shirt knows exactly what she means to me." Chances are that at this point, you will be saying these very words, to either a cat, or that empty bottle of UV that you "totally destroyed" earlier. Hey, that couch has some type of dirty shirt on it...

#7. The Don't Worry Dude, All of the Puke got in the Toilet Song: "Champagne Supernova"
It is 3 AM, you think. You have just emerged from the bathroom a wounded, but victorious human being, and you hear a calling to the living room. As the words from this song beckon you to ask yourself, "where was I when they were getting high?", you collapse on the couch, just as an exhilarated guitar solo starts, leading you on your journey to sleep, which takes about 20 seconds.

#8. The Holy Crap, My Piss is Oak-Brown Song: "Don't Look Back in Anger"
As you walk into the kitchen, you realize that look from your friend "isn't going to burn your heart out." He's cool about last night and the whole hooking up with his sister thing, alcohol was involved, and you said you would never do it again. At least not until Tuesday. But seriously, don't look back in anger, last night was the best night of your freaking life, don't lament on it.