Guy: Excuse me, Flo?
Girl: Uh, my name is Christy...
Guy: That's a lovely accent you have. New Jersey?
Girl: No... it's Southern, I'm from Austin.
Guy: Hmmm, California! Beautiful!
Girl: Actually, it's in Texas.
Guy: Well suck me sideways!
Girl: Excuse me?
Guy: Could you tell me how to get to the medical school? I'm supposed to be giving a lecture in 20 minutes.
Girl: Wow, are you a doctor?
Guy: Nope. My friend Harry and I are saving up money for a pet store.
Girl: Oh...
Guy: Yeah, One time, we successfully mated a bulldog with a Shih Tzu.
Girl: Yeah... Ha. Ha. You're funny. A Bull Shit, pretty original.
Guy: You're it.
Girl: What are you? 12?
Guy: You're it, quitsies!
Girl: You have a problem.
Guy: [hands over ears] LA LA LA LA LA LA!
Girl: I'm leaving.
Guy: I'm sorry; some little filly broke my heart.
Girl: Oh, I'm sorry. I know how you feel.
Guy: What's your last name? Swim? Swammi? Slippy? Slappy? Swenson? Swanson?
Girl: No, it's Johnson...
Guy: I was way off!
Girl: Yes, yes, you were.
Guy: So, what are the chances of a guy like you and a girl like me... ending up together?
Girl: I just met you...
Guy: The first time I set my eyes on you I got that old fashioned romantic feeling where I'd do anything to bone you.
Girl: Goodbye!
Guy: Big Gulps huh? Welp, see ya later!
by Kyle Anson at University of Iowa
by Sarah Schneider at Wake Forest
by Alex Schmidt at Syracuse
Amir launches the first aerial attack in the war's four year history.
A funny picture from CollegeHumor
So many different shows, you won't realize they're exactly the same!
They don't mean to be the bad guy here...
You skinny, even though you're fat in real life: How the world sees you is very important to you, but not as important as cake.
"I love sewage surfing, I just hate how the poop water makes my hair feel."
A funny picture from CollegeHumor
Get rid of that Bush once and for all
Recording...
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