Disclaimer- Everything to follow this is completely satirical. It is not meant for anyone to catch feelings. These comments are childish, immature, and nonfactual.

So I have to apologize for taking so damn long to put up this rant. Because it took so long, I will probably not get as many comments since people do not analyze my page that much. That's a lie, but I figure I'd try. Now instead of penning together some genius, I went to the Kanye West concert, shouts to Mary Cody thanks for everything! And the show itself was outstanding. For all of my readers that have never talked to me in person, according to some people, a person that personifies me the best would have to be Kanye West because of my extremely inflated view of myself and where I see my self in 10 years and so on.

Yea her boobs are SO fake. But do I care? Nope.

New Jersey was the only terrible thing in that entire show. Yes the state of New Jersey and..well time itself. Here is a breakdown of my night.
PM
2:00 - Left house to pick up Stephanie.

2:16 - Still in Friendly's waiting. Smelly old lady sits next to me on bench.

2:18 - Still in Friendly's. Old lady farts.

2:20 - Old lady get seated finally. Find out that Stephanie will not be ready till 3. Depression ensues. Why? The train was at 3:11.

2:45 - it is SO hot in that place. Stomach starts rumbling.

3:00 - Stephanie is almost ready. She disappeared to wrap silverware. Hunger increases.

3:15 - We leave.

3:30 - Stephanie's house.

4:00 - We leave for the station.

4:20 - Unbeknownst to us, a train was leaving as we were walking into her cousins house for some conversation.

4:40 - After realizing that we missed the train, we decide to wait till 5:20.

5:00 - While walking to get food, a kid asks us for a dollar. First hobo experience for the night.

6:00 - we finally reach Penn Station. Show starts in an hour.

6:15 - After reaching NJ Transit and hearing the random music, we find out that we just missed a train to Trenton.

6:20 - We cut our losses and take the train at 6:54.

6:50 - Entering the train we find out it is a mad house and people are darting in an our for seats. I want to sit on the top because if the train crashes I would like to go out on top. Plus I have an inferiority complex. Stephanie just wants the window seat.

6:54 - We leave. What ensues is an hour and a half trip to random ass Jersey.

7:30ish - I look out at a stop. Someone is being jumped during the day. W.T.F.

8:30 - We finally make it to Trenton. After finding out that we just missed another train going to Camden we must wait half an hour for the next. We decide to just try and find food. We walk down thinking it would be a great experience because..well it is Trenton. The capital of New Jersey. Little did we know, it was also, Trenton, the shit hole of Jersey. We see nothing but hobos and really depressed people. The town is empty. We walk back quickly. I grab my wallet.

9:00 - After purchasing some really good popcorn we make our way onto the train. The train leaves and we sit on an hour trip filled with horny black boys, loud people, bikes (?), and Amsterdam.

9:30 - A little black boy sits in front of us with his father. For the next half an hour he stares at Stephanie. Personally, I find it hilarious.

9:35 - He tries to touch her leg. I am still laughing.

9:40 - She does not find this creepy son of Rev Run funny at all. I am still laughing.

9:41 - He flat out turns around and stares wide eyed straight into her eyes. I finish my popcorn but I am about to spit it up trying to hold back my laugh.

9:42 - A group of people in front of us start laughing histerically. Also, at this point, 90% of the people on the train have a bike. Where are we? Asia?

9:50 - The kid gets off the train. I really wished he blew a kiss to her. Gosh that would have been funny. They raise us right.

10:00 - We arrive at the stadium. Just in time to see Kanye perfom.
*Fast forward two hours*

AM
12:00 - We manage to make the final Riverline train out. A bunch of kids are on the train also. Great fun ensues. O yes, they started smoking on the train. The TRAIN!

12:20 - We have moved 20 feet. We are in traffic. On a fucking train. A train? In traffic? Because there are cars on the tracks. I swear, outside of NY NO one can drive.

12:30 - We talk to a few rich Jersey Shore girls. I was looking for the camera so I can be on MTV. After listening to them talk about the lifestyle for a bit, I realized -

They are SO copying every girl from Long Island. Long Island > Jersey

1:00 - We are SUPPOSED to be in Trenton. Yet we are still in Camden. One of the worst cities in America. On MLK Blvd. Life is looking out great. More hobos.

1:10 - This kid is standing next to the Jersey Shore chick. He coughs. He coughs again. He spits on the floor. Then he throws up on his shirt. He continues to throw up in his shirt. The Jersey Shore girl asks him to sit down, he tells her he is fine, then he throws up some more on his shirt.

1:15 - He then walks forward to the door. He throws up some more, this time on the floor.

2:00 - We reach Trenton and we find out that we missed a train to NY. The next train is at 5:00. So what do we do? We find a cab with 8 random people. It then shrinks to 5 because some weird guy managed to sucker some people to come in the car with him.

3:00 - The guy driving the cab decides to use the bathroom. I wonder if he is going to leave us.

4:00 - We get to Penn Station and miss another train to NY. We wait to 4:54 for the next train.

6:30 - I get home.

Ugh. Fuck New Jersey.