Disclaimer- Everything to follow this is completely satirical. It is not meant for anyone to catch feelings. These comments are childish, immature, and nonfactual.

I have come to the conclusion that I like to stand out as much as possible. I remember I wrote a rant a few months back, wow it has been that long, stating the 3 levels of drunk white people. Now, I am not white and I do not believe one can act a color, but I would have to classify myself as "That Guy". Now I am not, "That Guy" that walks around naked and drunk at a party trying to impregnate every lamp post in the house, no, I am the guy that is sober and likes to be the center of attention. I like everyone to know that I am there.

I mean shoot, if you were my height you would do the same thing too.

Being short does not really have anything to do with it, actually, it probably just has something to do with my personality. I am an extremely outgoing person that will not take no for an answer and loves a good laugh. I love a good laugh at someone else's expense, and I love exploitation of things that really cannot be exploited.

I mean, shit, look at Facebook? I exploited the crap out of it and now I am generating a decent reader base. If Facebook was an human, it would be a dirty used up whore.

Terrible image. Please wear protection while using this.

For example. In high school, I never had a specific crowd that I hung out with. Besides my homeroom being the greatest homeroom in known existence, I never had a constant group of friends. I consider my self...static. Yes. Static. Ugh that adjective sounds kind of hot. I mean, lunch had a lot of good moments and I am not going to sit here and reminisce about high school.

Although it was fun as hell and it is amazing how many girls became whores now.

Ha.

I went on the Senior trip and I got my damn face painted in an African design.

Lets remember, I am Haitian. Not African. Did I care that I was being horribly stereotyped? Nope. That is like us calling an Asian chick Mulan.

But Mulan was cute.

But she was a cartoon.

And a man in the cartoon.

No homo.

Ha.

At work I am a clown. I ask people random questions that have nothing to do with the craptacular games that they are buying.

They can be buying Barbie's Fashion Princess and I will ask them about Britnie Spears. Does that have something in common? No. Because Barbie is an undercover/underwater/secret agent dicksucker and Britnie is the shit.

LEAVE HER ALAAAAAOOONNEEEEE.

That could also classify me as trying to be Britnie. She did all that crap to be the center of a attention. I mean, Britnie Spears could take a dump and have headlines about her. Now I am not as extreme as she is with it because I will not ever get pregnant, (but Ahhrnoolld did?), and no matter how often you people tell me too, I will not shave my head.

I like hair.

Not on cats though.