Leprechaun: Psst. Need some luck?
Boy: Who are you?
Leprechaun: I'm a leprechaun, asshole. What did you think? The Irish Gary Coleman?
Boy: Point taken.
Leprechaun: Here, try this out. It's a lucky rabbit's foot.
Boy: Aw gee! This is fantastic. And you say it'll give me luck?
Leprechaun: You bet your balls it will.
Boy: Aw gee! Got any more?
Leprechaun: Yeah, I got three.
(Dumps out bag, showing a rabbit with one leg amputated)
Leprechaun: Which one will it be?
Boy: I... I dunno. That's pretty intense.
Leprechaun: You want to be lucky, don't you?
Boy: I just never thought about where the legs came from.
Leprechaun: Surprise.
Boy: Can't you give me something else? You're a leprechaun. Surely there's something else.
Leprechaun: Yeah, no problem.
(Cuts open rabbit's stomach. Pennies spill out)
Leprechaun: Lucky penny?
Boy: Ugh!
Leprechaun: This one has your birth year on it.
Recording...
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