A Sore Subject

Turkey: Oh... hey, Eagle. What's up?

Eagle: Not much, how have you been? I haven't seen you in at least three hundred years, my fair-feathered brethren.

[Turkey self-consciously strokes his wattle.]

Turkey: Ha. I know, right? I've been ca-razy busy with my new part-time j-o-b.

Eagle: Yeah, well I hope there's no tension between us anymore, Turkey.

Turkey: No, we're cool.

Eagle: Are you sure? It was pretty awkward there for a while. I'm sure the divorce didn't help, but--

Turkey: I'm beginning to regain custody of them, so thanks for that.

Eagle: I'm not trying to ruffle your feathers but you must realize that I am the exemplary essence of this great land.

Turkey: Oh, relax. Our little feud died out about thirty years ago. Right around the time your species almost did the same.

Eagle: Real mature.

Turkey: DDT FTW!

Oak Tree: Hahaahahah, zing!

Eagle: Quiet, national tree.

Turkey: Eagle, I heard you got a little flak from Benjamin Franklin. He thought you were a pretty sketchy choice to symbolize this wonderful country.

Eagle: Yes, it turned out people did not instantaneously appreciate my stunning grandiosity. I can't decide if it was my seven-foot wingspan or powerful talons that eventually won them over.

Turkey: Franklin was always a big fan of me. One time he called me a "bird of courage." Not a big deal or anything.

Eagle: Whatever. I'd like to see you soar gracefully through the sky, and then spot food hundreds of feet below. Not as easy as it looks, actually.

Turkey: If you're such a swift and well-built killing machine, why did you end up on the Endangered Species list?

Eagle: I am dreadfully sorry about your family last November. Your parents were so loving.

Turkey: Truce?

Further assistance from The Caldwell Tanner.
Likes
104   Recording...
Share this article
Facebook Fark
StumbleUpon
Embed Myspace, blog
Email
There are 42 comments. Signin or create an account to see them.
NEWER    OLDER