You were
My own
Until I rudely
Cut you off with my roommate's kitchen scissors.
You had lingered
Around my crotch
Since late fall
And you resembled a sleeping otter
With a bad case of frizz.
I dismembered you
But, purely by chance
Noticed how springy, even spongy
Was your texture on my chin.
I even pretended I was Lenin, Lincoln,
And several other bearded historical figures
Until I came to my senses and abruptly swept you into my trash.
Parts of you,
Fell into my empty cereal bowl
I am sure that I will encounter you tomorrow.
by Neal Drew
by Alex Watt at Siena
by Brian Murphy
"Skynet will prove and disprove the existence of our puny 'God' seven times before you finish reading this sentence..."
How can you run from evil if you can't even jump over a fence?
Our graduates are prepared to take on WoW.
A quick, easy way to find out whether or not you're an alcoholic is if you cried at this.
No matter how much you practice your moves, this guy will put you to shame every time.
Lin Manuel has done great things since appearing in Hardly Working: Rap Battle. I don't want to say were totally responsible, but... We're not? A little respons�No? OK, we've met him.
The Wrestler, Lost in Translation, The Graduate and more get closure, once and for all.
but your governor's son can't pick his nose.
Recording...
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