 | Kevin Corrigan: I'm tired of making resolutions I can't keep. I resolve that I'm absolutely not going to go to the moon unless space travel becomes really affordable or I win a contest. |
 | Amir Blumenfeld: Lose Weight, Managing Debt, Save Money, Get a Better Job, Get Fit, Eat Right, Get a Better Education, Drink Less Alcohol, Quit Smoking, Now Reduce Stress Overall, Reduce Stress at Work, Take a Trip, Volunteer to Help Others, Holiday and New Year Health-e-Cards. Jake: You clearly plagiarized that from a resolutions website. |
 | Jeff Rubin: I resolve to meat new people, I've been getting bored of throwing steaks at the same friends. |
 | Conor McKeon: To finally get over the rough patch in my current relationship, and accept the fact that my girlfriend doesn't want to shave down there. |
 | Jeff Rosenberg: TO STOP MAKING MY GRANDMOTHER TRANSCRIBE ALL OF MY JOKES PERIOD |
 | Dan Gurewitch: I resolve to stop playing God with insects. I'm still going to torture and kill them in cruel and creative ways, but it will no longer be part of a larger plan. |
 | Andrew B: I resolve to drink champagne and watch Ryan Seacrest count down from 10 more than once a year. In other words, become the classiest Ryan Seacrest stalker ever. |
 | Jake Hurwitz: I resolve to be a better actor, stop talking with a gay lisp, not be a sell out, and everything else the commenters ask of me. Thanks so much guys! I take all of your criticism to heart!!! |
 | Sarah Schneider: This year, I resolve to experiment more with my boyfriend. For instance, what happens when you combine radon, boron and tellurium inside a butthole? |
 | Jason Michaels: My New Year's resolution is to stand up for myself. Unless you think that's stupid, then I can think of another one. |
 | Streeter Seidell: I resolve to rely less on technology. Sent from my iPhone |
 | Ricky Van Veen: Harder core pornography. |
 | Steve E: I would like to spend more time with family and friends who have passed away. I f***ing love cemeteries. |
 | Susanna Wolff: 1024 x 768 pixels. Also, buy a new TV. |
by CH Staff
by Susanna Wolff at Columbia
by Kevin Corrigan at Rowan
Amir launches the first aerial attack in the war's four year history.
A funny picture from CollegeHumor
So many different shows, you won't realize they're exactly the same!
Pretty accurate portrayal of the journey through life.
A Salt-n-Pepa parody that proves you can't spell "sensual" without "SMS."
she must give great head, otherwise this would be totally unacceptable.
He also ate $50,000 in non-consecutive, unmarked bills and his gun. The judge said the time he spent on the toilet was punishment enough.
Every American knows the story of the First Thanksgiving, when the Wampanoag Indians saved the Pilgrims from starvation and the two peoples celebrated with a feast. Lesser known is the "Second Thanksgiving." Like most Holidays, there was a lot of agg
Recording...
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