105%

Issue One Hundred and Twenty-Five

by 105%-O-Matic September 17, 2009


In color. Actually, two colors: black and white.

In school, I gave 110%. No wonder I failed math.
-Eric Van Der Schlogen
My grandfather winked at me when he told a secret, turns out the secret was that he was having a stroke.
-Will Martin
Most boring super-hero battle ever
Aquaman vs. Storm IN OUTER SPACE.
-Gregory Gorasil
I just had a really nice dinner and a lot of wine at the Space Needle in Seattle. I got so drunk the room felt like it wasn't spinning.
-Evan O'Toole
I wonder how cheerleaders on strike protest.
-The NTC
Are socks like condoms for people with foot fetishes?
-The NTC
You're an alcoholic if...
...you call Ping Pong Balls, "Beer Pong Balls."
-Drey Dailey
Going though airport security is like a really boring obstacle course.
-Patrick Cassels
I get mistaken for other people all the time. Like last week at a bar, a girl mistook me for someone who wasn't going to stare at her tits during our conversation.
-Conor McKeon
People talk about having "mind-blowing" sex. I'd rather have dick-blowing sex.
-Matt Doner
Click here to submit your own 105%.
Likes 84   Recording...
Share this article
See more
105%-O-Matic

105%-O-Matic

View Profile
Send a message

RECENT ARTICLES

More
There are 61 comments. Signin or create an account to see them.
241 / 6,039

Recent Articles

NEWER    OLDER

Visit Our Partners

next previous
BFF
www.buzzfeed.com

BuzzFeed tracks all of the web's obsessions in realtime. Find outrageous videos, juicy gossip, an obscure subculture breaking into the mainstream, or just an ordinary guy having his glorious 15 minutes of fame. Check out BuzzFeed now!