Girl: Ohhhh yeah, baby. Just like th- Wait!
Meat Loaf: What's wrong?
Girl: You can't just get right to it like that.
Meat Loaf: Why not?
Girl: We need...you know. Foreplay.
Meat Loaf: Oh. Wow. Yeah. Not really my thing.
Girl: I thought you said you'd do anything for love?
Meat Loaf: Right. But I won't do that.
Girl: That's what you were talking about? I always thought it was something more profound...
Meat Loaf: Nope. I just don't like going down on chicks.
Girl: So you'd go to "hell and back" before you'd perform oral sex on me?
Meat Loaf: Haha, now you're just trying to make me sound bad.
Girl: I just don't think it's fair.
Meat Loaf: Look, The Loaf doesn't need foreplay to get chicks wet.
*Meat Loaf summons a demon band and plays a 10-minute epic power ballad that turns the sky black, causes earthquakes, and opens a portal to Hell. Every woman on Earth orgasms twice.*
Girl: I'm so...satisfied...I think I might die.
Meat Loaf: They always do.
*Meat Loaf rides off to Hell on a motorcycle*
by Susanna Wolff at Columbia
by Brian Murphy
by CH Staff
"ur just jelly cuz ur a ghost and can't tap that"
Amir launches the first aerial attack in the war's four year history.
A funny picture from CollegeHumor
A handy flowchart showing how Thanksgiving night will probably go if you're a college student home from school.
Don't let your girlfriend "Yoko Ono" your score.
Thanksgiving is coming up, and you know what that means: there's a pretty good chance you're getting dumped this holiday season. Just so you're not caught off guard, here are the emotional stages that you will undoubtedly experience.
I can't wait for him to grow hair so I can give him a swirlee.
Recording...
Facebook
Twitter
YouTube
MySpace
