Articles Archive

5 total on Monday, May 19th

  • Awful Job Fair

    Summer is upon us and you know what that means: time to find a job. Any job. In honor of this vocational destitution, we have created an Awful Job Fair where you can rank the world's most terrible jobs.

    When you were little, the worst jobs you could think of were being the totally sub par green Power Ranger, Steve from Blues Clues, or a teacher, but times have changed. The real world is harsh and full of bodily fluids. For instance, Septic Tank Cleaner, Elephant Artificial Inseminator, or Fluffer? Which sounds the most miserable? Vote here!

    (And maybe be a little more wary of public handrails from now on.)


  • Hollywood Typos

    The worst place for a typo is in a title. In the fast-paced Hollywood environment, promotional materials are often rushed through development long before title typos or misunderstandings are caught. Check out some of these past and present advertising disasters:






  • Girl Site: <Talk>?
    Boy Site: <Yes>
    Girl Site: </Love You>
    Boy Site: <Why>?
    Girl Site: <Changed><Life target="_blank">
    Boy Site: </Go>
    Girl Site: </Relationship>
    Boy Site: <Friends>?
    Girl Site: </Friends>
    Boy Site: <Crying></Life>
    Girl Site: </Crying></Being a baby>


  • My friend Steve Dawson sent me this screenshot of his Facebook friend requests the other day and I thought I'd share it with you guys. The dude on the top is his dad, the second woman is his mom, the third is his 3rd grade teacher, the fourth is an old friend and I'm guessing you can figure out the last one on your own.




  • It's been an entire week since your last confession and there's been alot of good, solid sinning going on across the country. Check out thetop 5 and don't forget to submit your misdeeds to RoommateConfessions@GMail.com.

    My roommate was a jerk and a liar. Every morning after I finish my cereal, I let my dog finish up the milk and any leftover cereal. I then put it in the dishdrainer on top. That way he'll use it for his cereal without it being washed. He ate his cereal every morning with dog slobber and never noticed.
    C, UIUC

    Last year, I lived in a house with 6 other people. 1 of them, Dan, was an alcoholic. He also never bathed and actually stank up the entire house from the 2nd floor. It was like living with a homeless person because he also didn't pay rent and stole our booze, food, and various small things all the time. One day, I had bought some SoCo to mix up SoCo and lime for a party. We only used about 1/4 of it, because SoCo tastes like ass. I came back from work and found about 1/3 of what was left in the bottle missing. I figured that I must have miscounted it before. The next day, I come back from work and find another 1/3 missing and Dan's acting like his usual drunken self. All the booze-stealing finally pissed me off to a point where I couldn't let it go unchecked. I hid the bottle in my closet for the next few days and ordered some ipecac off of eBay. After it came in, I dumped a full bottle in the last of the SoCo and left it out. A couple days later, I come home from work and find chili sprayed all over the snow in the front yard and Dan inside holding his stomach. The bastard still had the nerve to tell me that he didn't steal any of my booze. He just vanished a few months later, so my friends got drunk and smashed up everything in his room and stole a few games, DVDs, and some stupid claw fantasy weapon, (he was a goth kid), and pissed all over his bed. Then they taped a plastic sheet over the door to keep out the smell. A few months later, he came back to grab all his shit and we haven't heard from him since.
    Keith, School Not Given


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