CollegeHumor: Girlfriends Articles This Month http://www.collegehumor.com http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1771833 Sometimes I Feel Like My Girlfriend is a Computer Fri, 06 Mar 2009 16:00:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1771833 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>


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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1171873"><img src="http://6.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/4/7/collegehumor.34fb0a748e9767bd8891bea7cfb6f87d.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-03-06 16:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1171873">Jason Michaels</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1146"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 995 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1765475 The Girlfriend Game! Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:00:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1765475 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

 What Your Girlfriend Said
What You Were Doing At The Time

A. "I can't believe you're enjoying this. 
It's all fake!
1. At Medieval Times

B. "I feel like I'm dating a child."
2. Visiting a Ripley's Believe It or Not museum

C. "It reeks in here!"
3. At a WWE match

D. "I can't believe you're still doing this."
4. Playing a game of Guitar Hero

E. "I'm breaking up with you."
5. Watching a pornographic movie

Answers after the jump!
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/a/collegehumor.7d8b975affed1e53fc3e6afa6f0a2364.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-12-03 16:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239">Streeter Seidell</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:271"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 379 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1748870 Your Girlfriend, Translated Tue, 29 Jan 2008 15:25:48 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1748870 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
Are you going out with your friends tonight?
Are you going to make me cry tonight?
Let's fool around later.
Let's snuggle later.
My friend, John...
This guy who wants to bone me, John...
Wow, your bathroom stinks!
Wow, I just blew up your bathroom!
I'm soooo drunk.
I'm soooo about to embarrass you.
Ooh, can I borrow this DVD?
Ooh, this is coming to live with me now.
My dad is just protective.
My dad is just a dickhead.
Ugh, I look so fat.
Ugh, I look for compliments by insulting myself.
Ugh, that girl is such a slut.
Ugh, that girl is better looking than me.
What are you doing this weekend?
What are we doing this weekend?
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/a/collegehumor.7d8b975affed1e53fc3e6afa6f0a2364.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-01-29 15:25:48 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239">Streeter Seidell</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:271"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 435 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1733892 I Think My Girlfriend Is One of Those Girl Victims You Always See In Horror Movies Thu, 14 Jun 2007 14:28:54 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1733892 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Me: What do you want to do tonight, babe?

Her: I don't know. Let's go down to the basement and talk about it.

Me: Why do you always want to go to the basement? It's dark, and wet, and gross.

Her: Ugh, you're so not spontaneous.

We hear shattered glass and heavy breathing.

Me: Did you hear that?

Her: Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello?

Me: Nine’s enough.

Her: Quick, turn off the lights!

Me: Turn them off? Why?

Her: That’s what it said to do in the forbidden videotape I watched to calm down after I was in that hit-and-run.

Me: Why don’t we go to Chili’s and – wait, what?

Her: Hey, there's some kind of tunnel over here that leads underground! And a trail of what appears to be red paint… I love art! Let's see where it leads.
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:56979"><img src="http://4.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/d/3/collegehumor.6ab7686d87358ff55bab1a935bae57f6.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-06-14 14:28:54 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:56979">Dan Gurewitch</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1210"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 68 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1728464 What's Going to Happen to My Relationship? Mon, 23 Apr 2007 22:36:18 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1728464 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Hey high school seniors! Well, its that time of year to start thinking about how much your life is going to change when you go off to college. I’m here to tell you how much your relationship will change if you and your girlfriend go to different schools. Luckily, I have a lot knowledge on this subject.

If your girlfriend goes to school in the Northeast:

Your girlfriend will change, drastically. She’ll keep in touch for the first month of school, but then less frequently as she says she needs to attend “Art House Films” and “Poetry Slams”. She’ll start dressing only in black and write a play about the government. She’ll leave you for a French exchange student named “Jacques” who posts on a blog and smells a little bit like sperm. She’ll come back for Christmas break converted to Judaism and will smoke expensive cigarettes.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:113945"><img src="http://0.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/f/0/collegehumor.9ac6fe1f3b110b3449c9b7a01e67477a.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:113945">Andy</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:74"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 23 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1731092 A Letter From Your Favorite Porn Site Before You Got A Girlfriend Wed, 16 May 2007 18:27:48 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1731092 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> WANT TO INCREASE YOUR SIZE BY FORTY INCHES OR MORE?  CLICK HERE!! axbzy897nh

Haha, just kidding.  We both know you'd never get close to the stallions we've got in our stables.  How you doing, kid?  Haven't seen you around in some time.  Been a while since "PussyDestroyer6969" graced our front page.  How're things?  Still using that "fake_email123456@yahoo.com" address?  Haha, just kidding, we know you just made that up.

Yeah, bet you thought you'd slip that by our servers, huh?  Man, if I had a nickel for every yahoo/hotmail email address that was some amalgam of "fake", "pussy", "email", and "fart", I'd have exactly $3,455.45.  You'd think someone would make an effort and just re-invite themselves to Gmail, and we'd get some classier email addresses.  But no.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:8131"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/b/collegehumor.1227666bde5ffee443178ceb5e3a762f.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:8131">Sean Curry</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:219"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 43 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />