At this point, resident Williams stopped the game and told everyone to “go back to their lairs (dorms) and wait for this jackanapes to leave”. Resident Jameson then leapt across the room to Williams screaming a “spell” in some gibberish. He open-palm slapped resident Williams who did not retaliate. Williams did say that he was going to go back to his room to get his “bastard sword from the swamp of Essex” to “gut the tyrant Jameson”.
   

I, Resident Assistant Bradley, told both of them to go to their rooms and wait until the Resident Director could talk to them. I cited Resident Jameson with a write up for assault and notified campus security. CS came and did a full search of both resident’s rooms and found nothing. When asked if resident Williams had a sword in his room, he denied, saying that his Lord (father) did not let him have it in the dorms but would lead a full on attack to get it back. 

Resident Advisors have been ruining college since day one and we've been there every step of the way to document the various ways these killjoys have been pissing on your parade.  Let's take a look at what we've pulled from our vast Archive, shall we?

Princestone University - Circa 10,000 BCE