CollegeHumor: Racism Articles This Month http://www.collegehumor.com http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1744025 Conversations Overheard Saturday Night at 2 AM at the Library Wed, 07 Nov 2007 13:44:44 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1744025 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> "나는 결코 더라면 이렇게하지 않고 구글 수있게합니다."

"정말?"

"물론입니다. 한국어 방법을 알고 이야기하는 이유는 무엇입니까? "

"내 추측됩니다 권리입니다. 잠깐, 여기서는 흰 사람들이 있습니까? "

"에 b 버스입니다."

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:941595"><img src="http://2.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/d/4/collegehumor.450b25bd2d89aa88e7fc86141030221e.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:941595">Craig Berman</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:42"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 232 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1738887 Lucas Henson, Racial Profiler Mon, 20 Aug 2007 11:47:56 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1738887 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> In today's episode, Lucas finally gets his roommate assignment.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:298"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/1/collegehumor.2618616bb5cffc06c7d7b8216893ee97.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-08-20 11:47:56 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:298">Jake Hurwitz</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:55"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 223 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1736130 Great Americans Fri, 13 Jul 2007 14:07:57 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1736130 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>

George Washington

ME: President Washington, you fought for American independence from the British. Do you believe the United States' involvement in the Middle East is protecting the legacy of freedom you built, or simply imposing its will on other nations?

GEORGE WASHINGTON: The Tree of Liberty is fragile, my lad. And difficult decisions are often required to defend it. Let us say, for example, my slave tells me a bandit has absconded with my stallion. Why, do I not then have the right to find the thief and--

ME: Wait. What? Your what?

GEORGE WASHINGTON: My stallion. It means horse.

ME: No. Your slave? Your slave tells you the horse was stolen?

GEORGE WASHINGTON: One of them, yes. And it's stallion. Not horse.

ME: Right. Thanks.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:101226"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/b/collegehumor.bf47a312f8c3b3d327c1333b4268bdca.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-07-13 14:07:57 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:101226">Patrick Cassels</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:857"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 25 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1725816 This is Gonna Be the Best Spring Break EVER Wed, 04 Apr 2007 13:27:42 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1725816 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> You guys ready? Everyone hit the bathroom, right? All right then, let's pile in. Daytona Beach, here we come! This is gonna be the best spring break ever. And don't worry about the trip. I know, Daytona's halfway across the country, but I'm sure between us four knuckleheads the trip will be as much of a blast as those beach babes—almost!

Seriously, though, if you do get bored, there's some literature I brought along that I really think you should check out. Just a few pamphlets, some eye-opening books. They've really changed the way I look at things, man. I mean, did you know we can trace our Aryan roots all the way back to the noble Nordic warrior-gods of Northern Europe? Crazy, huh?

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:101226"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/2/b/collegehumor.bf47a312f8c3b3d327c1333b4268bdca.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-04-04 13:27:42 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:101226">Patrick Cassels</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:857"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 9 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1716411 White Supremacist Disappointed with Fantasy Football Season Thu, 25 Jan 2007 14:30:29 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1716411 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
You know, it didn't start out so bad. During my draft, people didn't suspect anything when I took Peyton Manning with my first pick. Granted, it was a little odd when I went with Todd Heap in the second round, and I was definitely getting some weird looks when I snatched Mike Alstott in the third... But I needed a running back! A couple of kickers later, the K.K.Cakes were a decent looking fantasy football team.

Then the season started.

I lost my first couple games by quite a wide margin.  The Brandon Stokely injury hurt me, especially because I was already starting Kevin Curtis and a retired Ed McCaffrey. By midseason I had given my all to this league. I had stuck by my principles, never compromised my morals, but I was still 0-6. That hurt.

I had to get a little creative.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:334095"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/0/9/collegehumor.a6964960fee925bf0e569f794a056aeb.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:334095">Tai Washington</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:221"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 105 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1715827 Statements From The Un-Racist Racist! Mon, 22 Jan 2007 12:24:42 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1715827 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> View Article ]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/a/collegehumor.7d8b975affed1e53fc3e6afa6f0a2364.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-01-22 12:24:42 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239">Streeter Seidell</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:271"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 5 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1718848 Are You A Bigot? Sun, 11 Feb 2007 21:48:46 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1718848 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> I was in the bathroom the other day and I came across an intriguing poster titled "ARE YOU A BIGOT." I consider myself an open, loving, and accepting person. So, I decided to answer some of life's tough questions for those who are not as worldly as I....

1. Do you laugh at racist jokes?

No, this is really horrible. I've never heard, laughed at, or told a rascist joke. Racism is dead, this is the 2000's. Smeariously, I have a black friend!! It is faggy that this question even needs to be asked---so G-A-Y. My favorite kind of jokes are knock knock jokes. Wait, did you hear the one--knock knock...who's there...banana...banana who? knock knock...who's there...banana...banana who? knock knock...who's there...orange...orange who? ORANGE you glad I'm not black? Hahahahah. My grandfather tells that one every Christmas.

2. Do you say "that's so gay"?

Obviously. But I don't mean it like "that's so homosexual." That's gross. I mean it like "that's so retarded."  Retarded means gay, as defined by Webster's Dictionary (I think.) Duh. I would never say anything to hurt gay people. My Uncle Steve is gay, and even though he's not allowed in my house I still love him. He tries to send me letters and stuff but my mom won't let me read them. Sad.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/default/collegehumor.jester.23.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 53 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1726673 Imus Pulls A Kramer Tue, 10 Apr 2007 14:05:29 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1726673 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> It's been about a week since your parents' favorite radio personality, Don Imus, made racist remarks about the Rutgers women's basketball team. And by racist remarks, we mean calling them "nappy-headed hoes." He also referred to African Americans as "you people" on Rev. Al Sharpton's show.


Needless to say, Don Imus has pulled a Kramer.


We want to know, what will Don Imus do next?

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/a/collegehumor.7d8b975affed1e53fc3e6afa6f0a2364.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239">Streeter Seidell</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:271"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 8 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1733148 Racial Pros and Cons Wed, 06 Jun 2007 17:21:33 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1733148 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>


Race

Pro Con
Whites Majority rules. Laaame.
Blacks Hung like horses. Ask Grandpa, he'll tell you a few.
Jews Cash money. See: Egypt, Hitler, Arabs, Walt Disney, etc.
Indians (Pocohontas) Casinos. Relocation, relocation, relocation.
Indians (Apu) Successful in workplace. Workplace = taxi cabs.
Arabs Very peaceful people. Nut jobs get all the press.
Asians Efficient and industrious. Nike found out first.
Hispanics See: women on spanish channel. Can't see, no TV.
Brits Held reign over much of world. Not any more, suckas.
Aussies Sweet accent. As babies, must watch for dingos.
Irish Can outdrink anyone. Will outdrink everyone.
Canadians Hockey. Really just the 51st state.
Russians Invented vodka. ...to drink away misery.
French Home of romance. Romantic pussies don't win wars.
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:149211"><img src="http://9.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/3/5/collegehumor.f2aa2e031a119de2960fb1d5e9e38af1.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:149211">Josh Baker</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1132"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 201 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />