CollegeHumor: Super Mario Bros Articles This Month http://www.collegehumor.com http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1754607 Every Woman You Know as a Character from Mario Mon, 05 May 2008 16:54:22 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1754607 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> After the Nintendo came out with the new Mario Kart for Wii me and my buddies logged quite a few hours getting reaquainted with its cast of characters. One of my friends was having some woman troubles at the time, so somewhere along the line the conversation arrived upon the female sex, and their various gender specific attributes. The combination of Mario, and some healthy drunken gender bashing led me to a complilation of the varying types of woman and her corresponding character from the classic video game.

The Princess Peach: This is the girl of your dreams. She is beautiful, funny, sexual but not a skank, and generally your view of perfection. She is the kind of girl you want to meet your grandma. You would traverse the all kinds of worlds, fight deadly monsters in your path, and even jump over enormous bottomless pits to win her heart. However there is one problem with the typical Peach; for some reason she spends all her time surrounded by complete morons. She is highly coveted among other males, so it will be necessary to fight off an entire cast of villains to get a chance with this girl. You may think you have finally won her affection once or twice, but in the end she always ends up being stolen away by some dickhead dinosaur or hairy ape.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1618204"><img src="http://1.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/8/1/collegehumor.451bca28b9284ddd3e96bd6155633cb7.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1618204">Kenzie G.</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:402"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 315 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />