CollegeHumor: Weed Articles This Month http://www.collegehumor.com http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1775958 Six Movies You Should Only Watch While Stoned Mon, 18 May 2009 18:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1775958 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Why It Sucks:  
How to kill a multi-billion dollar superhero franchise? Camp, rubber nipples, and enough homoeroticism to sink a frat house full of bodybuilders. Also, bat-skates. It would take Chris Nolan's dark, gritty reboot The Dark Knight to make Batman a billionaire again. (Also, to make people instantly sick of the phrase "dark, gritty, reboot.")

Why It's Good High:
An Oscar-winning performance, a compelling narrative, and meditations on the nature of right and wrong. Bright colors, cartoonishly exaggerated set pieces, Alicia Silverstone's cleavage. One of these lists spells "stoner bait", the other has Maggie Gyllenhal whining so much that you just want someone to tie her to a chair and set her on fire (too soon?). If you need any more convincing of B&R's unique charms:




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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:34106"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/1/e/collegehumor.19dc6c6166e28b864a1f0ece84a80bf0.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-05-18 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:34106">Ben Joseph</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1236"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 146 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1774808 Weed Dealer or Mom? Tue, 28 Apr 2009 18:00:00 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1774808 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
Make sure you call me.
Mom
I made cookies!
Weed Dealer
Nothing but the best for you.
Weed Dealer
This here is the good stuff.
Mom, referring to the name-brand soda she just splurged on at the A&P
I'm always around if you need me.
Weed Dealer
This weed is the dankest sh*t.
Best. Mom. EVER.
Are you by yourself?
Weed Dealer, unless you're walking home at 2am, then Mom
Got a nice selection for you today.
Weed Dealer/Mom who just went jean shopping
Make sure you get your money's worth.
Your Mom is a Weed Dealer
It doesn't matter how late it is, just call.
Weed Dealer
That sh*t ain't mine.
Weed Dealer/Terrible Mom
What are you doing later? Wanna hang out?
Mom, if it's your first Thanksgiving back from college. Otherwise, Weed Dealer
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:293"><img src="http://8.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/d/d/collegehumor.2500d10d3b58683f1224355d5ee015c3.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-04-28 18:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:293">Sarah Schneider</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1120"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 308 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1770247 Michael Phelps does 25 Random Things About Me on Facebook Wed, 04 Feb 2009 17:00:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1770247 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
1. I am good at swimming.  Like, really good.  The best.  Ha!  Isn't that weird?  To, like, be the best in the world at something.  So weird.  

2. I legit like Wheaties.  They're awesome.  I'm eating some right now.  I'm pretty much taking a spoonful of peanut butter and dipping it in the Wheaties box so some Wheaties get stuck on the peanut butter and then I eat it.  Sooooooo F*cking Good.  

3. This video is so funny.  http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1899220  LOL.  I've def been like that kid before  All like, "is this real life."  

4. Have you guys seen Eternal Sunshine?  I have.  Sick.

5. Straight up, Chinese people are tiny.  Like little Oompa Loompas.  LOL!  Did you know that in the book of Willy Wonka they say the Oompa Loompa's are from, like, darkest Africa or something?  They had to change it for the movie cuz it's racist.  Why are people racist, right?  It sucks that some people are that ignorant. 
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/a/collegehumor.7d8b975affed1e53fc3e6afa6f0a2364.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2009-02-04 17:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239">Streeter Seidell</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:271"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 67 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1765619 Stoner-Vision Fri, 19 Dec 2008 16:30:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1765619 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
Sober   :::   High


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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239"><img src="http://7.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/a/a/collegehumor.7d8b975affed1e53fc3e6afa6f0a2364.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-12-19 16:30:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:239">Streeter Seidell</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:271"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 1383 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1764683 The Supreme Weed Names Archive Wed, 12 Nov 2008 14:00:00 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1764683 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Reply if you think of any - if they're good they'll be added to the list.

History/Politics:
Tocahontas, Henry Wadsworth Lungfiller, Hit-ler, Mao Zebong, Chronica Lewinsky, Budyard Piffling, Rosa Sparks, Dankston Hughes, Ban Kief-Moon, Res-hitdent Abraham Stinkin (inspired many with his Headysburg Address), George W. Kush (attacked Saddank instead of Al-Highda), Karl Drove, Kief Bowlbermann, Neil Armsbong, Buzzkill Aldrin, Alexander GramBag, Jack the Ripper, Barack Drobama/Obonga, Joe Highden, James K. Toke, Buddha Maccabee, Arispotle, Socratrees, Pyschwagoras, Burnoulli, Archiweedes, Coburnicus, Bongfucius, Ripper Gore, Kim Bong Il, Rutherford B. Haze, Kief Ericson, Eliot Splifftzer, Al Sparkton, Pol Pot, Skunkle Tom's Cabin, William Bakespeare, Thomas Headison, Queen Elizapiff, Gov. George Patoki, J.R.R. Tokien, Hemperor Highrohito, Arianna Puffington, Benjamin Danklin, Burnest Hempingway, Albert Highnstein, Headie Roosevelt, Warren Puffitt, Condotreezza/Chrondaleezza Rice, Genghis Chron, Pope Burnadict XVI, Mapotma Ganjdhi, Blaze Pascal, Droseph Stalin, Julius Treesar, Chief Hitting Bowl, Tom Tokaw, Ben Burndanke, Dr. Kieforkian, Henry Hittinger, Janet Treeno, Bowlin Powell (Chairman of Joint Kiefs of Staff), Ted Treevens, Mahmoud Ahmaweedijad, Kiefi Annan, Trent Pott, Dr. Kieforkian, Mikhail Roorbachev, Treesus Christ, Sacagaweeda, Ho Kief Minh, Winstoned Churchill, Chron Paul, Princess Highana, Georgia O'Kief, Soburner Truth, Harriet Dubman, Fidel Casdro, Highnnibal Barca, Cleopotra, Yasser Arafatty, Ayatollah Dromeini, Elie Weedsel, John D. Roorkefeller, G. Gordon Middie

TV/Movie Celebrities:
Reefer Sutherland, Stephen Bowlbert, Spliffany Amber Thiessen, Helen Blunt, Headie Lamarr, Chronic the Hedgehog, Roach Carter, Tom Danks, Schwaggy and Doobie Doo, James Ganbowlfini, Higha LeBeouf, Nabowleon Highnamite, Bilbowl Schwaggins, Hashton Kusher, Starsky and Dutch, Cherry Seinfeld, J.K. Bowling, Luke Highwalker, Darth Vaper, Han Bowlo, Bud Apatow, Bongfellow Weeds, Nug Funnie, Sharon Stoned, Bubbler Fett, Tina Burner, Russell Drowe, Kiefachu, Hitmonlee, Bowlbasaur, Jigglypuff, Patrick Hempsey, Puffy the Vampire Slayer, Joe Seshi, Middy Driver, Bluntston Checks In, Blazing Arizona, Splifford the Big Red Bong, Angelina Bowlie, Brad Hitt, Aunt Jehighma, Queen Lakiefah, Burnie Mac, Anne Hashaway, Ron Burngundy the Danchorman, Dennis Quaidlude, Hashley Bowlson, Conan O'Highen, Halle Cherry, Richard Highfuss, Michael Nuglas, Bolonel Sanders, Morgan Treeman, David Grasselhoff, Treeyoncé Bowles, Tyra Danks, Doprah Winfrey, Schwagger Vance, Donkey Bong, Bowl Yeller, Nugs Bunny, Elmer Budd, Yohittime Sam, Highly Coyote, Patrick Blayze, Don Highmus, Hilary Puff, Highderman, Groucho Sparx, Schwaggie Gyllenhall, Hookah Brasi, Herbal Kint, Anheuser Kush, Thomas the DankEngine, Adrien Drody, Kief Ledger, Roman Bowlanski, Dankenstein, Trey Sparker & Matt Stoned, Dustin Huffman, Albus Dumbleroor, Prof. Severus Vape, Prof. Minerva McGanjagall, Harry Potter of Piffendor House, Stony the Tiger, Alec Bowldwin, Phillip Seymour Puffman, John Bonglushi, Hugh Huffner, Rob Highner, Kirsten Blunts, Eliza Kushku, Paul Budd, Droby McFire, Angeweeda Drolie, Mark Wahlburn, Jeremy Piffen, Clint Eastweed, Kate Beckinscale, Weedy Allen, Rush Limbong, Willy Bongka, Ganjay Gupta, Sam Waterstoned

Music:
Dank Sinatra, Miley Highrus, Jon Bong Jovi, Toko Ono, Justin Timberbaked, Kim Kardhashian, Buddy Holly, Philly Joel, Jimmy Huffett, Headie Mercury, Bubba Sparks, Ben Bowlds Five, Bowl Nugs n' Harmony, Immortal Tokenique, Herbie Hancock, Tom Headie, The Beaster Boys, Paul Highmon, Clay Baken, Ruben Buddard, Nat King Bowl, Van Inhalen, Weedzer, Green Day, Headie Vedder, AC/TreeC, Phil Sesh and Friends, Treezy E, Pearl Gram, Jerry Cigarcia, Buddhacris, Harry Chronic Jr., Higher Straits, Bowlja Boy

Sports:
Michael Roordon, Andre Schwagassi, Bud Selig, Scottie Rippin, Highger Woods, Ken Spliffey Jr, Herby Puckett, Willie Haze, Droberto Clemente, Ernie L's, Dank Aaron, Charles Sparkley, Evander Bowlyfield, Mike Highson, Al Lighter, Nuggsy Bogues, Hakeem Olajubong, Dikembe Mutombowl, Allen Highverson, Hobie Bryant, Lebong James, Sticky Williams (Highsman Trophy winner), Wade Bonggs, Thai-stick Cobb, CCC Sabaggia, Dro Torre, Pound Gasol, AJ Burnett, Sparky Lyle, Chien Ming Bong, Joba Triple-Chamberlain, Hank Game-Greenberg, Marijuano Rivera, Jorge Drosada, Arthur Hashe, Kobe Highant, Muhighmmad Ali, Kareem Abdul-Jabong, Tony Dromo

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Contributors: Eric Feinberg (JHU), Andrew Pugliese (SCSU), Tyler Pepe (Bryant), Zach Wright (RPI), Steve Schwartz (Lehigh), Max Roberts (Colgate), Dan Pinkert (Wisconsin), Cody Ballou (Pace), Kevin Adamovich (Iona). THIS IS A GLOBAL PROJECT.
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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1814874"><img src="http://8.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/d/5/collegehumor.9d199d9dc83a3d3bd4f753d5bdf282f1.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2008-11-12 14:00:00 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:1814874">Eric Feinberg</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:4"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 18 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1725359 How Not to Buy Drugs Sun, 01 Apr 2007 19:47:35 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1725359 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> [upload:1129886:small:left:Is this how this works, or...?]Are you my guy? Are you the guy I'm meeting? My friend said you'd be wearing a hat.  That's not very descriptive though, there are like 30 people out here wearing hats. My boy said to just drop his name. So here it goes.  Ryan.  Does that do anything for you? Do you know Ryan? Cool, I guess you're my guy.  Ryan's guy with the hat, what a foolproof method, can't go wrong there.

So he said you had good stuff at a fair price. No, I don't want weed idiot, I want cannabis sativa.  Oh, right, I was just joking. So how much tetrahydrocannabinol is in this? You don't know? I feel like that's something you should know. You would be a horrible salesman in the real world. Sorry, sorry, I'm just saying.

I don't know how much I want. How much is enough for me to get high, but not too high, just like a medium high. Is a pound enough to get me high...better give me two, just in case? An eighth? Of a pound? Oh right, ounce, I knew that. A dime bag? Wow, it's that cheap. In that case give me like 20 dime bags. I thought drugs were a lot more expensive, I guess the economy's doing well.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:326"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/c/9/collegehumor.45397a4c6c8241522ef776b95348cf0f.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written 2007-04-01 19:47:35 by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:326">Jeff Rosenberg</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:1236"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 97 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1716845 RoboNarc Sun, 28 Jan 2007 21:05:34 -0500 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1716845 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2>
GREETINGS PEERS. Do you also recall us using marijuana together last night? I will proceed when you answer in the affirmative.

I am unable to recall a time when I have ever been more affected by tetrahydrocannabinols. It was considerate of your friend named JAMES JANSTA to enable our DRUG PURCHASE.

Prime directive #2 requires me to ask if you know where JAMES JANSTA is now? I mean, do you know where James is? I want to obtain more tetrahydrocannabinol rich cannabis.

Well no matter. Let's continue discussing the enjoyable experience of cannabaloid receptor saturation and cease worrying about the probable whereabouts of JAMES JANSTA.

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:"><img src="http://3.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/default/collegehumor.jester.23.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 19 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr /> http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1725084 A Political Debate With My Stoner Roommate Fri, 30 Mar 2007 12:55:02 -0400 http://www.collegehumor.com/article:1725084 <table border=0 width="360px"> <tr> <td colspan=2> Affirmative Action

Hey.  Hey, Doug.  Wake up.
Huh?  Wha?
Wake up.  We're going to have a political debate.
We are?
Yup.
...Why?
Because.  Come on, get up.
...
Doug
...
DOUG.  C'mon, I'll get you something off the Wendy's dollar menu.
JBC?
Yeah, sure
...arrite, what's up?
We're having a political debate.
We are?
Yeah.
Well, I think it should be legalized.  A 1998 study showed that when compared with alcoh-
No, no, not about that, Doug.
Wait... what?

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]]> </td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan=2> <hr> </td> </tr> <tr><td valign="top" width="35px"> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:8131"><img src="http://5.media.collegehumor.com/collegehumor/ch6/b/b/collegehumor.1227666bde5ffee443178ceb5e3a762f.jpg"></a> </td> <td valign="top"> Written by <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/user:8131">Sean Curry</a> <a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/school:219"></a> <p> <img src="http://www.collegehumor.com/artwork/icon_likeIt_noLink.gif" align="texttop" /> 31 likes </p> </td> </tr> </table> <hr />