Cheating Survey Results
Share on Facebook These results are based on 29,176 responses (29,176 - that's what you have, right?)
- Have you ever cheated?
- If you have ever cheated, did you feel bad about it?
- Cheating at schools with an Honor code vs. schools with no honor code
- What is your favorite cheating method?
- What is the average GPA of cheaters vs. non-cheaters?
- Does religion affect cheating?
- Does gender affect cheating?
- Have you ever intentionally plagiarized?
- Of schools with 30+ students responding, which has the most cheaters?
- Have you ever been caught cheating?
- If you have been caught, did it make you stop cheating?
- Do you allow others to cheat off you?
- If you allow others to cheat off you, what do you ask in return?
- If you cheat in school, are you more likely to cheat in relationships?
Have you ever cheated?
Jeff Rosenberg
You mean to say the majority of college students don't care about memorizing useless information?!? Seriously?
Jake Hurwitz
This means that almost 61 percent of college students cheat, and 39 percent lied on this survey.
Jeff Rubin
Odds are that you, the person reading this, are a cheater. We have forwarded your IP address to your school's disciplinary committee.
Amir Blumenfeld
Don't worry parents, our Survey has an error rate of +/- .001% so that number may actually be closer to 60.799%.
If you have ever cheated, did you feel bad about it?
Jake Hurwitz
However, when asked this question by their crying Grandmother, 100% of students proved remorseful.
Jeff Rosenberg
The same 27.1% of people rescinded their "felt bad" response after seeing their passing grades and getting money back for their textbooks.
Come on dude, get with the program!
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Cheating at schools with an Honor code vs. schools with no honor code
Amir Blumenfeld
Maybe it would make more sense for schools to print the honor code directly onto toilet paper so it won't hurt as much when students seemingly just wipe their asses with it.
Jeff Rubin
For the purposes of the survey, we still considered the honor code valid even if a student crossed their fingers while signing it.
Dan Gurewitch
The schools with the Honor Code requested that we not release the stats, adding, "Pretty please with sugar on top".
Jeff Rosenberg
This is similar to the "make it legal and the kids won't do it argument" that is often used in drug legalization arguments. What I'm really trying to say is all schools should allow cheating... and drugs.
Come on dude, get with the program!
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What is your favorite cheating method?
Jeff Rubin
Programming notes into your graphic calculator has overtaken writing on yourself. We are truly living in the future.
Amir Blumenfeld
"More than one way" includes such time honored traditions as ether-ragged professor and quadratic equation skywriting.
Dan Gurewitch
This corresponds with the well-known fact that 5.6% of Americans have tattoos, and 11.1% of Americans have tattoos in their graphing calculator.
Jake Hurwitz
Looking-over-your-shoulder cheating is like driving 5 miles per hour over the speed limit- It's like taking a bong hit of tobacco, funneling an O'douls, smoking pot that's NOT laced with PCP. Pussies.
Come on dude, get with the program!
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What is the average GPA of cheaters vs. non-cheaters?
Amir Blumenfeld
If you're not smart enough to cheat, you're not smart enough to maintain a B-average.
Come on dude, get with the program!
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Does religion affect cheating?
Come on dude, get with the program!
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Does gender affect cheating?
Jeff Rubin
One possible reason for the discrepancy - according to a separate survey, more females consider oral sex cheating.
Dan Gurewitch
Results not affected by the fact that intersex students cheat on their significant others every time they masturbate.
Come on dude, get with the program!
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Have you ever intentionally plagiarized?
Jeff Rubin
Plagiarism (from Latin plagiare "to kidnap") is the practice of claiming, or implying, original authorship or incorporating material from someone else's written or creative work, in whole or in part, into ones own without adequate acknowledgment. Unlike cases of forgery, in which the authenticity of the writing, document, or some other kind of object, itself is in question, plagiarism is concerned with the issue of false attribution. Plagiarism can also occur unconsciously; in some cultures certain forms of plagiarism are accepted because the concept can be interpreted differently.
Come on dude, get with the program!
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Of schools with 30+ students responding, which has the most cheaters?
Jeff Rosenberg
Unfortunately this data will be sent to the top 3 schools and consequently 71.9%, 67.9% and 67.2% of the graduating senior classes will randomly be held back another year for admitting to cheating.
Come on dude, get with the program!
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Have you ever been caught cheating?
Jeff Rosenberg
The most common response from cheaters after being caught was "60.8% of college kids cheat, why don't you focus on the other 39.2% who WEREN'T caught."
Jeff Rubin
If you're dumb enough to get caught, you were probably too dumb to learn the material anyway. At least you went down swinging.
Jake Hurwitz
It won't happen again, baby, you know I love you. I love you, you're my world, Econ 101, I won't do this again- I swear to you.
Come on dude, get with the program!
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If you have been caught, did it make you stop cheating?
Amir Blumenfeld
"What are the odds of getting caught twice!" Thought the expelled student as he mopped a floor.
Jeff Rubin
The other 92.9% claimed they could quit any time they wanted to, just one more crib sheet.
Come on dude, get with the program!
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Do you allow others to cheat off you?
Jeff Rubin
Most of those who said yes were under the false impression that if everyone got an A, the class would receive a pizza party.
Jake Hurwitz
In third grade, I brought in 28 packages of Bubbalicious so everyone would be my friend. That didn't work, and neither does letting people cheat off you.
Come on dude, get with the program!
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If you allow others to cheat off you, what do you ask in return?
Amir Blumenfeld
4 times as many kids value sex over money. Stupid kids, money will buy you sex as well as many other things!
Jake Hurwitz
Or 12.2% of CollegeHumor readers thought asking for sex in return was the coolest answer.
Jeff Rosenberg
With the majority of cheaters being male, the 12.2% asking for sex in return is a little disconcerting, to say the least. I'm talking about gay people if you didn't catch it the first time.
Come on dude, get with the program!
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If you cheat in school, are you more likely to cheat in relationships?
Dan Gurewitch
That same 17% explained that the test was suffocating them, they're not like, married to the test, Jesus, just leave them alone.
Come on dude, get with the program!
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